This is the blog of ML Candelario

And you are a visitor here. Welcome. This blog is a place for me to display my prose, poetry, and philosophical musings. I hope you enjoy reading them. Feel free to leave a comment or two (or as many as you like) providing constructive criticism. Be nice. Thank you. Have fun. That is all.
Email: authormlcandelario@gmail.com

A List of Books I Read in 2024 (in [Basically] No Particular Order)

Previous years’ lists: 2023202220212020201920182017, and 2016.

These are all the books I read in 2024. If the title and author of the book are bold and in italics, that means I recommend the book. If not, either I didn’t like the book or I don’t feel it is accessible enough to recommend to everyone.

fiction

  • Same Bed Different Dreams – Ed Park
    • This is a weird alternate-history novel that reimagines the Korean War. It proposes that a government-in-exile has existed all this while, secretly influencing wide-ranging world events in the hopes of unifying Korea once more. Very weird and stylistically singular.
  • Pen 33 – Anders Roslund & Börge Hellström
    • I re-read this book this year because I remembered liking it. However, upon this new read, the themes seem very heavy-handed. It centers around the release of a violent pedophile from Swedish prison, his immediate decision to rape and kill a child, and a father’s decision to kill him since the justice system has been unable to thwart the monster. In my opinion, it does not adequately deal with the nuances of asking whether revenge is or ought to be permissible. Instead, it goes off on a “where do you draw the line” question, which seems pretty straightforward to me: maybe when the violent sex pest has been proven to be one and has vowed to commit more crimes, only to be released by the justice system? Idk, seems a clear line.
  • To Be Taught, If Fortunate – Becky Chambers
    • Becky Chambers is one of the best doing it today. In this novella, four astronauts have been sent out to explore remote worlds and the promise of extraterrestrial life. These scientists travel between planets through suspended animation and eventually receive news that Earth has undergone some technological disasters, and they might be the last ever astronauts. The novella is a short read that explores what it means to be human, what it means to seek knowledge, and what it means to explore. Handled with Chambers’ trademark kindness and empathy.
  • The Absolute Book – Elizabeth Knox
    • This fantasy novel introduced me to the sidhe, fae creatures from Irish folklore. In The Absolute Book, the protagonist Taryn mourns the death of her sister and is questioned about the death of her sister’s killer by a policeman named Jacob. The two become entrenched in a centuries-long mystery involving the mysterious “Firestarter,” some kind of sacred text that apparently Taryn’s family has protected for a very long time. I won’t say much else except to say that you should read this. It’s delightfully paced and I felt that it paid off its literary debts incredibly well.
  • Outpost (Donovan Book #1) – W. Michael Gear
    • Outpost is the first book set on the planet Donovan, on which pretty much everything wants to kill the settler humans. Corporations have sent ships to Donovan and other planets for terraforming and the extraction of minerals. However, the regularly scheduled shipments to Donovan have stopped with no explanation, leading to an overthrown government. When one corporate ship does arrive, questions have to be answered. This is a fun space-marine-style novel that left me wanting to read the next in the series.
  • Every Heart a Doorway (Wayward Children #1) – Seanan McGuire
    • If you were taken to an alternate reality as a child, slipping into some fantasy realm that has totally different rules you must learn to follow in order to survive, how would you adjust to life once you’re back in our plane of existence? In short, you probably wouldn’t. In this novel, McGuire imagines a school for kids who have come back from alternate worlds and need a place where their stories can be understood.
  • Seven Surrenders (Terra Ignota #2) – Ada Palmer
  • The Will to Battle (Terra Ignota #3) – Ada Palmer
  • Perhaps the Stars (Terra Ignota #4) – Ada Palmer
    • The Terra Ignota series is one of the best sci-fi series I have read in recent memory. It’s going to be a classic of the genre soon. Set in a world a few hundred years in our future, the series is written as a memoir of a heinous criminal turned penitent who has access to all the strings of power that affect the world. The books are nominally written to humans who live after the events of the story, as a way of cataloging what happened at this pivotal juncture of human history.
  • The Passenger (The Passenger #1) – Cormac McCarthy
  • Stella Maris (The Passenger #2) – Cormac McCarthy
    • Recent bombshells regarding his relationship with a teenage girl while he was in his fifties have soured me on McCarthy, but I read this last duology he wrote before learning about that. He was undeniably a genius of prose.
  • A Canticle for Leibowitz – Walter M. Miller, Jr.
    • This novel spans thousands of years and starts in the aftermath of a world-ending nuclear holocaust. Set in a Catholic monastery that serves as a repository of books and learning, the novel explores themes of church vs. state as well as the cyclical history of the world and mankind’s self-destructive tendencies.
  • Children of Time (Children of Time #1) – Adrian Tchaikovsky
    • In the future, humans begin terraforming entire planets, shaping them to our will like gods. A terrorist group opposes this practice, which includes releasing a special enzyme that directs and speeds up evolutionary processes. As the terrorist group coordinates attacks on various worlds, we see one planet on which the enzyme has been released, but whose apes (who are supposed to benefit from this enzyme) are totally eradicated as a result of the terrorist attack. Millennia later, humanity is on its last legs, has lost much of its scientific knowledge, and is moving to these cultivated worlds, hoping to find a ready-made home. When the ship arrives, it will find a world that has been evolutionary primed… but not for mammals.
  • Embassytown – China Miéville
    • I have not stopped thinking about this book since reading it. Miéville is an experimental author who never writes a normal story. In this novel, humanity has spread across the universe and has encountered many other species. One species is unique, however: the Ariekei’s version of communication, known simply as Language, requires two mouths speaking with one mind simultaneously. This can only be accomplished by humans via “Ambassadors,” or genetically engineered twins who are, for all intents and purposes, as close to being the same being as humanly possible. Language is the only form of communication in the universe that does not have a concept of lying or speculation. It is perceived as actual fact, as actual reality, by the Ariekei, who recognize no other form of communication. Then, some stuff happens to upset the balance and change life in Embassytown forever.
  • Dark Matter – Blake Crouch
    • This was a book club book. I think my club generally liked the novel, but recognized that its themes of multiple realities and alternate dimensions are a little played out and have been done better by other authors. It’s a good, quick read if you want some entertainment, but I didn’t leave it thinking about anything necessarily new in the genre.
  • The Big Nowhere (L.A. Quartet #2) – James Ellroy
    • My friend Will is a big L.A. Quartet fan and loaned me this novel to read. It’s quintessential noir set in 1940s/50s L.A. Great if you love crime novels.
  • The Shadow of the Torturer (Book of the New Sun #1) – Gene Wolfe
  • The Claw of the Conciliator (Book of the New Sun #2) – Gene Wolfe
    • These two books, often published together as one volume called Shadow and Claw, are the first half of Gene Wolfe’s epic Book of the New Sun. Frankly, the Book of the New Sun as a whole is one of the best, most important and compelling science fiction novels I have ever read. It is a memoir written to us by a young man named Severian, who has been trained as a torturer in an Earth (actually now known as Urth) set potentially up to 1,000,000 years in our future (the exact timeline is a little unclear). Severian lives at a time when the sun is dying and human civilization has regressed on Urth to medieval levels (except with aliens and alien technology and the remnants of previous advanced eras sprinkled in). Seriously, read this book. Be warned, though: it is dense and difficult, but well worth the effort.
  • In the Watchful City – S. Qiouyi Lu
    • The protagonist of S Qiouyi Lu’s story is Anima, a “node” within a living network called the Gleaming that surveils and keeps in check the city of Ora. Up to this point, Anima’s job has been straightforward: keeping the citizens of Ora in harmony. Then, a mysterious visitor shows up and has a bunch of items, each of which represents a story of life beyond Ora’s walls. This changes Anima’s perspective considerably.
  • What Moves the Dead (Sworn Soldier #1) – T. Kingfisher
  • What Feasts at Night (Sworn Soldier #2) – T. Kingfisher
    • T. Kingfisher reimagines some classic tales and folklore in these stories, through the lens of a Sworn Soldier of Gallacia: an AFAB person who entered the Gallacian army and is now considered nonbinary. The first book retells Poe’s The Fall of the House of Usher and the second deals with a folkloric enemy known as the moroi.
  • Into the Forest (The Familiar Vol. 2) – Mark Z. Danielewski
    • After re-reading this book, I stopped doing my fine-toothed-comb read-through of The Familiar series. Mostly because it takes a lot of time and energy, and I wanted to read some new stuff. Danielewski’s tale is, as usual, so good and complex and fun to tackle.
  • Exordia – Seth Dickinson
    • In my opinion, the less you know about this book going in, the better. Exordia is a military-heavy, but also science- and philosophy-heavy sci-fi novel that follows a daughter of a Kurdish freedom fighter who makes first contact with an alien. This alien is on humanity’s side, apparently, but admits that its species is ontologically evil. The prose is fast-paced, the themes are interesting, and the story is wild. Highly recommend.
  • Sometimes I Lie – Alice Feeney
    • This was another book club book that I felt didn’t fully hit the mark. Feeney’s story centers on an incommunicative coma patient who slowly reveals her history over the course of the novel. There is some (in my opinion unnecessary) sexual violence that happens in the narrative, and the narrator herself tells us that she is unreliable (“sometimes I lie”). Overall, it’s an interesting thriller that stumbles over the finish line with one too many convenient(?) twists and turns.
  • The Postmortal – Drew Magary
    • In the near future, humanity conquers death. Cool, right? Actually, no. Society crumbles, and we get to see it from the perspective of a former accountant who takes the anti-death drug early on. Cool concepts, but it goes on for too long and ultimately seems a little flat and stale to me.
  • The Necessity of Stars – E. Catherine Tobler
    • Another first-contact book on the list, Tobler’s novella features some of the most beautiful prose I’ve ever read. If you like weird fiction, you’ll like this book.
  • Early Adopter – Drew Harrison
    • Drew Harrison is a teacher who wrote a novel called Starfall that I reviewed for a website called Reedsy. He reached out to me to review an ARC of this short story collection, and I was happy to do so. I’m even more thrilled to report that this book, which contains stories focused on the adoption of new tech and AI, among other things, is killer. I highly recommend checking this out and supporting an up-and-coming self-published author.
  • Family Lore – Elizabeth Acevedo
    • I read this one for book club as well and loved it. The story is a magical realism tale about a Dominican-American family and its many mothers, aunts, and daughters. There are a few things that fell a little flat, like the usage of current-day slang that can feel a little out of place or off-putting, but overall Acevedo paints a compelling picture of this magically gifted family.
  • The Haunting of Tram Car 015 (Dead Djinn Universe #0.3) – P. Djèlí Clark
    • I haven’t read the other books in this series, but picked up this short novella at my local library. Clark centers his story in an alternate India in which some rip has opened up between our reality and the world of djinn and spirits. One of these spirits, seemingly, has taken up residence in one of the city’s many tram cars and requires exorcism by a specialized detective agency. It’s a good read, quite short, and the word Clark has created is ripe for more concepts. I want to read the others in the series to see what he does with what he’s built here.
  • The Black God’s Drums – P. Djèlí Clark
    • My second book by Clark, this one is also a short book situated between a novella and a true novel, I’d say. We follow an orphan girl in an alternate-reality New Orleans, which now serves as a sort of no-man’s-land or demilitarized zone between the free Caribbean isles, the United States, and the Confederacy. The story revolves around the potential for a special weapon, called the Black God’s Drums, to fall into the hands of some very bad people.
  • The Sluts – Dennis Cooper
    • This is apparently an iconic work of Cooper’s, whose oeuvre tackles questions of violence and sexuality within the gay male community. The Sluts tracks the fictional story of a gay prostitute via blog posts and news articles, and the reader is privy to some truly horrific violence. I respect the quality of the writing, but I find it hard to recommend given its intensity and, at times, grotesquery. It will make you question your belief in humanity’s good qualities.
  • Darkly Dreaming Dexter (Dexter #1) – Jeff Lindsay
    • I don’t know if I’m in the minority here, but I really wasn’t impressed with this book. In fact, I never went on to read the second Dexter book because this one just kinda fell flat to me. If you’ve never watched the show, the plot follows a blood splatter analyst with the Miami Metro Police who also happens to be a serial killer. The book isn’t bad, per se, it just didn’t scratch the itch I was hoping for it to scratch (read: Thomas Harris books like The Silence of the Lambs).
  • Grey Dog – Elliott Gish
    • This book club book was stellar. Set in the early 1900s, Grey Dog follows a recently shamed (we know not how at the beginning of the book) schoolteacher who moves to a small town. There, she discovers that all is not quite right. There is some kind of entity around, an embodiment of total freedom and wildness, that begins to call to her.
  • Altered Carbon (Takeshi Kovacs #1) – Richard K. Morgan
  • Broken Angels (Takeshi Kovacs #2) – Richard K. Morgan
    • I loved the first season of Altered Carbon on Netflix, so I decided to finally read the books that birthed it. I was not disappointed. Each book in the trilogy has a different flavor (the first is noir-esque and cyberpunk, the second is almost a treasure hunt tale with aliens sprinkled in), but they center on Takeshi Kovacs. He’s a former Envoy, or trained military killer, who hops around in time due to humanity’s discovery of stack technology (i.e. you upload your “soul” to a datastack and then can be “re-sleeved” in a new body if your current one dies… so long as the little chip in the back of your neck is still intact).
  • The Hellbound Heart (Hellraiser #1) – Clive Barker
    • Clive Barker is a little bit hit-or-miss for me, but this one is definitely a hit. It’s the first appearance of the Cenobites, those priests of pain and pleasure led by (though you shouldn’t call him this) Pinhead. This is the novel that was later turned into the cult classic film Hellraiser, which was directed by Barker.

nonfiction

  • Native American Spiritualism: An Exploration of Indigenous Believes and Cultures – L.M. Arroyo
    • While I learned a good deal in this book, I think Arroyo’s treatment was a bit heavy-handed in the way that colonialism and whiteness is discussed. I also think my reading suffered just from the fact that this can only be, and was designed to be, an introduction to the varied world of indigenous spiritual practices over the course of history.
  • The Mind’s Eye – Oliver Sacks
    • This is a fascinating list of case studies involving people whose mental faculties (sight, ability to parse the written word, facial recognition, etc.) have been taken from them via some kind of illness or medical issue. Sacks, a neurologist, handles each case with the appropriate empathy and respect while also allowing the reader to dive into the intricacies of the brain and how our minds operate.
  • The Biggest Number in the World: A Journey to the Edge of Mathematics – David Darling & Agnijo Bannerjee
    • This is just a fun math book about really, really, ridiculously large numbers. If you like that sort of thing, you’ll enjoy this.
  • Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have To Much to Do (and More Life to Live) – Eve Rodsky
    • In 2024, I finally finished reading this book that offers a game-ified approach to chores. It’s mainly geared toward married or partnered couples, and it designed to ease the burden typically put on women for the unspoken work of running a household (i.e. making sure everyone has a packed lunch, making grocery lists, doing laundry, planning vacations, taking the kids to various practices and performances, etc.). In our society, that role typically just lands on mothers, even though most households pretty much require dual income in order to survive. Rodsky’s solution is designed to make chore choices more intentional and the load more evenly split between all partners.
  • Paperbacks From Hell: The Twisted History of ’70s and ’80s Horror Fiction – Grady Hendrix
    • Look, this is exactly what it says on the tin: a wonderful journey through the golden age of paperback horror. Grady Hendrix, no stranger to writing horror novels, is our guide through these two crucial decades. One of my goals is to read every book listed here.

poetry

  • 27 Threats to Everyday Life – Anne Holub
    • Anne Holub is a poet with whom I previously worked, and this collection showcases her command of language. As the title suggests, the poems here deal with various dangers and threats that the modern human being must contend with.
  • Light at the Seam – Joseph Bathanti
    • No synopsis for you. Just go read all of Bathanti’s work. He’s phenomenal. And yes, disclaimer: I studied under him at Appalachian State University once upon a time, so I might be biased.

graphic novels

  • Gender Queer: A Memoir – Maia Kobabe
    • As I wrestled with my own pansexual awakening this year, I stumbled upon this graphic novel by Maia Kobabe. It’s their story of feeling like they don’t quite fit into the different boxes or labels that our society recognizes regarding gender and sexuality, and it’s honestly just a beautiful, emotional read.
  • The Strange Talent of Luther Strode (Luther Strode #1) – Justin Jordan
  • The Legend of Luther Strode (Luther Strode #2) – Justin Jordan
    • I typically get my graphic novels from my friend John’s library (it’s pretty extensive). He recommended these two to me, and I enjoyed them quite a bit. Luther Strode is a wimpy nerd who responds to one of those back-of-the-magazine ads for a system that will make you stronger. He becomes essentially a superhero. A worn trope, maybe, but played with here in a fun way.
  • Daredevil: Born Again – Frank Miller
    • This is my first Daredevil book, and what a doozy. Frank Miller may be a cryptofascist or whatever, but damn can he spin a tale.
  • Orphan and the Five Beasts – James Stokoe
    • Mo, an adopted orphan who has been trained as a fighter, is sent to defeat five former disciples of his master, all of whom have become corrupt and harmed the land. Honestly, the story is cool but I would read this just to see Stokoe’s trademark art. He’s so unique and visually arresting.

audiobooks

  • The Cuckoo’s Calling (Cormoran Strike #1) – Robert Galbraith
  • The Silkworm (Cormoran Strike #2) – Robert Galbraith
  • Career of Evil (Cormoran Strike #3) – Robert Galbraith
    • Look, I know we’ve canceled J.K. Rowling with good reason (her anti-trans mindset and harmful rhetoric). But I have had these audiobooks on the backburner for a while and so I finally decided to read them. Written under a pseudonym, these books follow private eye Cormoran Strike as he solves a series of crimes. At the end of the day, Rowling is undeniably good at creating characters and spinning a yarn. There is at least one trans character in this series, as well, and I feel like she is portrayed very sympathetically. Then again, I am not trans and that’s not really for me to decide.

A List of Books I Read in 2023 (in [Basically] No Particular Order)

Check out previous years’ lists if you’re interested in other books I read, like 2022, 20212020201920182017, and 2016. These are all the books I read in 2023. If the title and author of the book are bold and in italics, that means I recommend the book. If not, either I didn’t like the book or I don’t feel it is accessible enough to recommend to everyone.

Shoutout to my friend Marina for getting me to finally post this even if 2024 is almost over. Sheesh.

fiction

  • The Sparrow (The Sparrow #1) – Mary Doria Russell
    • A haunting tale of spirituality and sci-fi. A Jesuit priest and his friends pick up what appears to be music coming from another planet. Secretly, the Jesuits send a group to investigate what may be alien life. The story starts as the sole survivor of that mission is brought back to Earth and has lots of mysteries to answer for.
  • Rookfield – Gordon B. White
    • White wrote this short, weird book during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic. It’s an eerie, gothic tale of a man going to his ex-wife’s rural town to bring his son back to the city where he feels he will be safer. But what he finds in Rookfield is less and more than what he hoped.
  • Too Like the Lightning (Terra Ignota #1) – Ada Palmer
    • This is my book of the year. It’s an insane, futuristic romp told by an unreliable narrator and based on the idea of flying cars that connected the farthest points of Earth in little more than a few hours. A truly global society is in crisis, and there is a god living among humans. This book is wild and amazing, but it’s also very much ergodic in nature (it’s one of those difficult to read books that some of us love).
  • Existence – David Brin
    • Look, I would recommend this book, but there is a lot of cringe happening here (specifically in Brin’s treatment of autistic people. There are some good and cool ideas in this novel, but I felt it was overshadowed by language that is very much a relic of the age in which it was written.
  • How to Sell a Haunted House – Grady Hendrix
    • I like Hendrix’s books in general. This one is about a couple of siblings who inherit their parents’ house after a fatal car crash. The underlying plot centers around the idea that the house is haunted by their mother’s old dolls. Honestly, the book is decent. It’s just really difficult to get through the siblings hating each other and refusing to have a simple conversation that would solve most of their issues. I got too frustrated with them to be able to recommend the book in good faith.
  • Veniss Underground – Jeff VanderMeer
    • The author of The Southern Reach trilogy (which you may know as beginning with the book that spawned the Natalie Portman film Annihilation) flexes his muscles in this one. Technically, he wrote this book first, but whatever. Veniss Underground is about a future in and after a human-driven climate apocalypse, with body modification and sentient animals and a bunch of wild stuff. The less you know about it going in, the better in my opinion. It’ll blow your mind.
  • Biography of X – Catherine Lacey
    • Biography of X is a fictional biography of an artist presumed dead (“X”) written by her surviving wife. It’s set in a future America in which the southern states have seceded to form a theocratic country. The book is written well, but it can be a slog at times to track the dates and names in this pseudobiography, and you’re sometimes left wondering why it even matters in the first place.
  • We Won’t Be Here Tomorrow and Other Stories – Margaret Killjoy
    • This short story collection is excellent. Written by a renegade, counterculture transwoman, the stories center around identity, belonging, and creating and protecting positive societies in a dystopian future.
  • Guards! Guards! (Discworld #8; City Watch #1) – Terry Pratchett
    • A dragon is coming to the city, and the city watch is all that stands between it and the total destruction of society. I mean, come on. It’s Terry Pratchett.
  • One Rainy Day in May (The Familiar #1) – Mark Z. Danielewski
    • I re-read this one. Man, I wish Danielewski would return to The Familiar and finish his 20+ novel concept.
  • The Man with the Golden Arm – Nelson Algren
    • My friend Will picked this for our book club. It’s an important work by Algren that centers on a convict and drug user who shakes his habit in prison but has to fight to stay off the drugs when he’s back in the real world. A little too depressing for me.
  • The Shadow of the Wind (The Cemetery of Forgotten Books #1) – Carlos Ruiz Zafon
    • Just an incredible book. This one, another re-read, was one of my picks for book club this year.
  • A Fatal Grace; A Rule Against Murder; and The Brutal Telling (Chief Inspector Armand Gamache #2, #4, and #5) – Louise Penny
    • CI Gamache continues to solve murders in and related to the usually peaceful, idyllic town of Three Pines. Nice, cozy mystery books by Louise Penny.
  • A Crown of Swords (The Wheel of Time #7) – Robert Jordan
    • It’s taking me forever to read this series even though the world is amazing and I love the story. Sometimes it slogs along.
  • The Actual Star – Monica Byrne
    • Another of my book club picks. This came close to being my book of the year, but Ada Palmer won. It’s a story told in three separate timelines: one in ancient Mayan Guatemala, one in current day Guatemala, and one in a future world in which humans are all connected by a worldwide network called the ai. Really cool concepts and worldbuilding, and the narrative flows smoothly in my opinion.
  • Project Haily Mary – Andy Weir
    • Weir is hit or miss for me. His protagonists (including in this one) are a bit too cutesy and their internal monologues often feel juvenile. But the overall story here (an astronaut heading to a far-flung star in the hopes of finding a cure for a sun-eating plague that has started to affect Sol, is phenomenal. And the friend he eventually meets is an absolute gem. The worldbuilding here is more than good enough to make me recommend the book.
  • Jerusalem – Alan Moore
    • This million-plus-word novel is not for everyone. But it’s Alan fucking Moore and I had to read it. If you stick it through to the end, it really pays off. Ostensibly, it’s about Moore’s hometown of Northampton, but the novel spans many millennia and includes historical characters, ghosts, and a heavy dose of what I’m sure is actually Alan Moore’s genuine metaphysical outlook. It’s really amazing and I’ve shamelessly decided to steal some of the concepts for future writing projects.

nonfiction

  • The Japanese Myths: A Guide to Gods, Heroes and Spirits (Myths #5) – Joshua Frydman
    • I read this as research for some future projects I am working on. It’s fairly comprehensive, but I do think it suffers a little from being an “outsider’s” telling of Japanese folklore and mythos rather than being written by a native Japanese person.
  • The Writing of the Gods: The Race to Decode the Rosetta Stone – Edward Dolnick
    • This book is a fascinating, captivating story about the two geniuses who competed and built on each other’s work to decode the famous Rosetta Stone and learn how to read ancient Egyptian hieroglyphs. It’s a tale of human ingenuity and intelligence that you shouldn’t miss.
  • Trust the Plan: The Rise of QAnon and the Conspiracy That Unhinged America – Will Sommer
    • Exactly what it says on the tin. I found this book illuminating, but also depressing because so many people are duped by the nonsense that is QAnon. It’s important if you want to understand modern America, but it also doesn’t feel great.
  • Hannah Arendt: A Very Short Introduction – Dana Villa
    • My first real dive into the philosophy of Hannah Arendt. She was a genius.
  • On the Origin of Time: Stephen Hawking’s Final Theory – Thomas Hertog
    • Hertog was Hawking’s long-time collaborator and friend, and together they took on the greatest question of all: why is there something rather than nothing? When modern physics looks to the past, we can run our equations all the way to a mere fraction of a fraction of a fraction of a second after the universe (and time itself) begins to exist. But when you push it to time T=0, the actual moment of creation, our mathematics fall apart. Anyway, Hawking and Hertog suggest that, just as quantum physics appears to imply that our observations of experiments literally affect the outcome (especially relevant is the double slit experiment), so too our existence today affects the way that time itself started. I know, it’s hard to understand and I don’t get it, but it was fun to read and attempt to think about.
  • Monster Kids: How Pokémon Taught a Generation to Catch Them All – Daniel Dockery
    • Full disclosure: Daniel Dockery is an old friend of mine from college. This is his publishing debut, and it’s fantastic. It tracks the origins of the Pokémon phenomenon, its impact on the world, and the entire industry it spawned. In other hands, this could be technical and dry, but Dockery’s love for the topic is clear and makes the book entirely relatable.

Chapter-By-Chapter Stories, Vol. 1

Though the Heavens May Fall

Chapter 1: Angels’ Tears

Painting copyright (c)Mike Sagaser

Mr. Grimoire kept the kiddies in a room scarcely big enough for the twelve of them, in beds pressed up nearly upon one another, two rows of six old half-sunken beds with thin, icy sheets. The smell of sweat and damp mold graced the air—and it was a grace, when it came right down to it. This was something Topher knew, that even this musty, frigid broom closet he called a home was a kindness. The youngest and smallest of these twelve orphans—these street urchins, these vagabond children—Topher knew that without what little scraps Mr. Grimoire afforded them, he’d be out on the streets again. Prey to the complex politics of the city’s grimy underworld.

Or rather, that’s what Topher tried to tell himself he knew. Tried to remember. On nights like this—frigid sheets pulled up to his chin in a vain effort to stave off the wind that navigated tiny gaps in the walls’ warped wood—it was difficult to remember that he preferred this life. Out there, maybe he’d be dead, sure. But then again, dead boys don’t feel the cold. So it was a toss-up. A coin flip, as to which was better. Like one of Olney’s sadistic gambles.

As if bidden, Topher heard the snores of Olney spin out along the room’s still air. There was another grace, if Topher was reminding himself of his blessings: his spot was here, pressed between the Creole and the wall, far away from Olney and his snores and his gambles. Down here with only the Creole near him, gentle and kind and the only sort of friend Topher had ever known—much more vibrant than the rest of these ashen-faced malnourished ragamuffins with whom Topher lived. The Creole wrapped himself in the mystery that only young children can cultivate, preferring everyone call him by his strange nickname rather than his given name of Cortez. The rest of the boys were either Olney’s Four or else slick-eyed cowards who much preferred Olney to beat up on Topher than to turn his fierce attentions on them. Boys living for the next day, no imagination in them. Perhaps, thought Topher, the imagination had been squeezed out of them.

Outside, a shrill rain began to drip onto the orphanage’s tin roof, pocking it with metallic notes that Topher found quite saddening. Like angels’ tears. That was something from his childhood, something his mother had told him as a toddler that always stuck with him on nights like this. The drizzly drops of angels’ tears. That’s how she used to talk about rain.

But Topher’s mother was dead, long gone. His father, too. Gone in the same instant while toddler Topher ran away, knowing somehow not to scream, not to cry out in that crucial moment, instead winding his way out of the house and into the back alleys of his old neighborhood, down past the ruined cinema and the Muckeaters’ Market. He had known somehow to slither away like a snake, running on tiny toddler legs barefoot through the mud-drenched streets, managing barely to avoid the pools of sludgy bacteria that must surely have been down there, wriggling between his toes, trying desperately to take down this one remaining member of his house, of his family. And that is where he had stayed: first finding shelter under a crumbling bridge still on the Muckeaters’ side of town where the guards’ patrols were short and the guards themselves uninterested in their duties; then stealing a tattered pair of shoes out of a shop window to cover sore feet that would surely have gone gangrenous without them; and finally rummaging for food among the trash heaps and gathering the occasional handout from a shopkeeper in a good mood.

And then, for the last few months, his life had been here at Mr. Grimoire’s Home for Boys. Grimoire was a cold man, a hard man. Thin as a reed, his face as hawkish and stern as one of the weathered busts outside the ruined cinema in the Muckeaters’ District, Mr. Grimoire had but one significant quality that forced these homeless boys into line: he was old. Older than anyone Topher had ever seen before—perhaps sixty, maybe even seventy years old! And the man was strong. Thin he might be, but Mr. Grimoire was not someone Topher wanted to cross, if he could help it. Sometimes Mr. Grimoire would take a boy out for the night, leaving the empty bed as a testament to the boy having misbehaved. Topher didn’t know what went on—he’d never been singled out for these punishments, never toed the line with Mr. Grimoire’s rules—but from the stony faces of the boys who returned in the morning and the awkward, knowing glances shared with others who’d crossed the line some time before, well… Topher imagined some dark dungeon or pit Mr. Grimoire would throw the boys down for the night. He imagined terrors pressing in, darkness all around, maybe water at the bottom of the pit. Standing all night without any sleep can make a boy look like that, Topher knew. He’d seen those eyes back in his days on the streets. Five-plus years on the street by yourself, you get to know the look of those who haven’t slept in a while. Darkness, chains in a dungeon, perhaps a pit to stand in all night with water up to the knees. Something dreadful it must have been, as even Olney—who, it must be said, broke the rules the most and therefore took the brunt of Grimoire’s punishment—even cruel Olney came back with that hollow fire in his eyes.

Topher was scaring himself. He began to see encroaching demons in every shadow cast by the flickers of the room’s single candle, began to imagine that the tinkling of the rain on the orphanage roof was the clicking of demon claws—hellspawn come to scoop him down to the depths of the earth where he’d never escape, down to the darkest and wettest of dungeon pits. He shut his eyes and muttered to himself:

“No need to fear. It’s only angels’ tears. Tears of joy. Angels’ tears.”

The Creole harrumphed in his sleep and turned over, disrupting the room’s gentle snores with the protestations of mattress springs. Some of the boys’ breathing changed, almost on the verge of waking.

Only angels’ tears, my love. My little Topher. Just angels’ tears of joy.

This time he said it in his head, so the demons and other boys couldn’t hear.  So the room couldn’t disturb itself against the pitter-patter on the roof.

Just angels’ tears, my love.

Day arrived without warning—an intruding brightness upon Topher’s eyes. Orange-yellow-white, when just a moment ago it was all blackness and candle-flickers. Wasn’t he just thinking about the angels’ tears falling on the tin roof? How, then, could it be morning already? And yet no longer could Topher hear the pinpoint drops dancing out their melody. When night had left, so had the rain.

Groans of bodies and bedsprings announced that the others were also waking. Topher eased his sticky eyes open and tried to flick the crust from their corners. The Creole was already up, standing at the end of Topher’s bed already dressed out of the old pillowcase he used as nightclothes and into the gray shorts and blue shirt that constituted the boys’ uniform.

“Up an’ awakey, Toph the Goph.” The Creole’s face split into a wide grin that Topher couldn’t help but return—regardless of the stupid nickname. The Creole had tanned skin, darker than Topher’s own ghostly pallor. His hair was curly and matted in the back from where he’d slept on his pillow in the same position for too long.

“Ain’t even how the sayin’ goes, Creole. It’s ‘up an’ at ‘em.’ And the name’s Topher.” It was like this every morning with the nickname and the routine. And even though Topher knew that this was all part of the plan they’d cooked up—the plan to take back the name Olney had been using to hurt him—a part of him really did get offended at the words.

“No time for talk, Mr. Topher, sir.” The Creole held out Topher’s light blue shirt and gray shorts—a slightly smaller version of the outfit the Creole wore, though still marked by stains and little patches that spoke of a storied history—and a pair of scuffed black leather shoes. “Wouldn’t want to miss the Speech.”

“Well if it ain’t Topher the Gopher!” Topher’s heart seized as Olney plodded across the room. The floor didn’t actually boom with the bully’s footsteps, but Topher decided that maybe this was simply because the floorboards themselves were scared of Olney. “Dint’cha hear, Creole? Gopher don’t need to listen to the Speech anymore. We already know he’s goin’ out to run errands. Topher, Topher, go fer this, go fer that. Sucking up to the old man like a newborn to ‘is mama.”

Topher didn’t say anything. He tried not to look at the hulking mass of muscle before him. Okay, Olney wasn’t that big. But when Olney was at your head, calling you names, trying to get his fingers down deep inside your soul, he seemed like he took up more room than he really did. The other boys coincidentally became very interested in pulling their clothes from the small trunks beneath their beds. Suddenly all Topher could see around him was a bunch of unruly hairstyles peeking up from behind the bedframes.

“Just gettin’ dressed, Olney.” Even to Topher, his voice sounded weak. Maybe even squeaked a little. Like a mouse. Like a damned mouse. But this was the plan he and the Creole had agreed upon. Don’t rile Olney. Let him be. Let him have his fun. Carnival day was coming, and that’s when they could get him. So he took the clothes from the Creole’s still-outstretched hand and began to don them.

Just gettin’ dressed, Olney. Just gettin’ dressed.” The imitation was not kind. Shrill and scared-sounding. Like a damned mouse, indeed. “Cry for mommy some more, you little runt.” Across the room, Olney’s Four snickered their approval at the insult.

“I don’t cry for my mother.” Topher’s hands were clenched now. He didn’t know when that had happened. “You’re…” He meant to call Olney a liar, but the Creole’s head was shaking. He saw it out of the corner of his eye, a subtle jerk of black curls that told Topher to hold off. Get your revenge later, the curls seemed to say. Get your revenge at Carnival Day.

“I’m what,” said Olney, his oily face turning down slightly, little dog eyes staring at Topher’s fists. “What am I, Gopher-runt? Tell me.”

“Olney. You’re Olney.” Topher unclenched his hands and picked up his clothes, keeping his eyes on his feet, head bowed in obeisance. “I meant nothing.”

“You meant ‘nothing,’ eh?” There was a ferocity in Olney’s voice. A fire. Topher didn’t understand, but he kept his eyes down. Follow the plan. Later. Later. “You meant ‘nothing,’ did you? I’m nothing now?”

“Olney, come—” But the Creole’s injunction was cut off by a louder tirade from the bully.

“I’m nothing now, eh? Me? That’s right. Look at your shoes, you sniveling runt. I’m not the one crying out for mommy and the angels, am I? I’m not the one waking up with dried tears all over my face, am I? Nothing to you, eh? Maybe I’ll show you what nothing is.”

Topher chanced a look, bringing his eyes up to meet Olney’s stare blazing cold down at him like blue fire, and the Creole next to him, gaze fixed firmly on Olney’s cheek with an unreadable look.

“That’s not what I meant. I meant that I didn’t mean nothing by saying things.”

The Creole’s face was starting to screw up in rage. Topher had only ever seen that look on his face once before. Just once, at Mr. Grimoire’s back.

“Toph’s only nine, Olney. And he survived out there for five of those years.” The Creole’s finger pointed out through the room’s wooden walls, but his eyes were fixed on Olney. “How long did you last out there on the street before coming here, to this… softer life?”

Olney swiveled slowly, eyes seeming to drift along the plane between Topher and the Creole, unfocused and crazy. Remember the plan, Topher tried to say to the Creole. But his hair was not curly and his vigorous headshakes went unnoticed.

“What did you say to me?”

“I’m just saying—”

“Softer life in here, eh!” Strangely, Olney’s voice had grown quieter, smaller. But nonetheless Topher was more scared now than he had been before. “I’m the bringer of pain, baby. I’m the ruler of the underworld in here.” He gestured to the small room. “I’m the one who breaks the rules. I’m the one who tests the bounds. No one talks to me like this.”

“Yeah, you break the rules, big man. You forget that some of us know what you get for it.” As soon as the words were out of the Creole’s mouth, Topher could tell he regretted saying them. He knew, and Topher knew, that the plan was over now.

A beat of silence.

And then Topher became convinced that a demon really had broken into the room. Such was Olney’s fury.

Topher could do nothing. He stood, helpless, as Olney’s left hand closed around the Creole’s throat. Before the Creole could react, Olney’s right fist was pummeling into his face. Once, twice, maybe five times the fist connected with the Creole’s nose.

Topher could do nothing. Olney released the bleeding Creole and began kicking him. He was shouting something, but Topher’s brain was unable to parse out the words. Kick after kick, stamp after stamp, Olney’s massive foot connected with the Creole’s ribcage, with his knee, with his head.

Topher could do nothing. He watched Olney beat his friend nearly senseless, the horror of it building in his spirit. Out there, on the street, fights broke out all the time. Some of them gruesome and terrible, some of them just shiv-and-run robberies. Topher had seen some bad fights in his day. Nothing compared to this, the sheer brutality of Olney’s blows. He seemed not to tire, Olney. His rage seemed to build instead of subsiding with each hit.

When it was over, the Creole lay on the floor in a growing puddle of his own blood. Most of it seemed to come from his nose, which was still leaking red fluid through the fingers of his right hand. Cuts zig-zagged across his olive face, and his left arm was bent unnaturally. He cradled it against himself like a wounded dog, breathing heavily but saying nothing. His one unswollen eye stared calmly at something behind Olney. Topher wanted to know what was commanding the Creole’s attention, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the friend he had been utterly unable to help.

And then:

“What. Is. Going. On. Here?” The old man’s voice was jagged and cold, like gravel in the snow. He didn’t yell, choosing instead to speak slowly and carefully in a way that carried foreshadowed menace as he trundled into the room. Today, as ever, he wore a long black cloak over a pristine white shirt, his belt a run of chain clasped together with a gold snake that was in the process of eating itself. “Someone. Explain.”

Topher could do nothing. In his mind, he revealed everything—that Olney had antagonized him, the Creole had come to his aid, and then Olney had inexplicably exploded into a flurry of punches and kicks. Instead, his mouth dried up and his tongue stopped working.

“This bastard called me names. Sullied my reputation.” Olney’s thick finger stretched out toward the Creole. “Came over here to see if the little one was alright. ‘E’d been crying in his sleep all night. Calling for mommy. And then this bastard stepped in for no reason. I think they’re lovers, personally.”

Olney tried to smile, but cowered under Grimoire’s gaze. Not even Olney’s Four laughed.

“Intriguing as your theory may be, I fail to understand the chain of events.” Mr. Grimoire looked from Olney to Topher, and when Topher once more failed to be able to speak, from Topher to the Creole. “Cortez, do you have anything to add that might alleviate my confusion?”

The Creole’s one good eye stared, calmly, at Olney. A bubble of spit and blood emerged from his lips and dribbled down his chin onto his blue shirt.

“Boys, anything to add?” The old man’s gaze swept the room and found no one willing. “Well, then. In the absence of any second opinion I guess I’ll have to take Olney’s word for it.”

“Like I said, sir, he sullied my reputation.” For a brief moment, the savage bully looked proud. Topher almost thought he was about to smile.

“And so you resorted to this,” said Mr. Grimoire. He pulled at the Creole’s shirt with one hand, at Olney’s own shirt with the other. Both were stained with blood. “You sullied my uniforms. Not to mention the floor. It’ll take hours to get the stain off the wood, I imagine. Hours. And who do you think will be doing the cleaning, Olney?”

“Me, sir?”

“You. It will take much longer to fix what are obviously a broken nose and a broken arm, Olney. Much longer. And the King’s Inspectors are due within a fortnight. Do you know what would happen if the King’s Own decided that my orphanage was a danger to children, hmm?”

“No, sir.”

“No. You do not. Let us simply say, it would sully my reputation, Olney.” Mr. Grimoire pulled the Creole to a standing position, ignoring how the Creole slumped and threatened to swoon back to the floor. “You will come with me, Olney. I have much to discuss with you two about… your punishments.”

Topher saw Olney gulp—actually gulp—at Mr. Grimoire’s words. And then the three of them were leaving, Olney trailing behind the Creole, who limped along in Mr. Grimoire’s clutch making no sound.

As he crossed the threshold of the boys’ room, Mr. Grimoire stopped and turned to face his charges. Was there a flicker of distaste as his gaze swept across the mystically mute Topher?

“I will meet you boys downstairs in five minutes for the morning Speech, at which time tasks will be given you for the day. I expect to see you all there promptly and ready for the day’s work, despite this unfortunate… delay.”

Topher finished dressing in silence as the other boys walked out. A minute later, the room empty, he slowly strode to the door. Before he left the room, he turned back—just as Mr. Grimoire had done. “Olney started it, sir,” he whispered to the shade of Mr. Grimoire’s presence, to the demons that inhabited the shadows. “Olney was harassing me. Cortez came to my aid, tried to stop Olney from being mean and from hurting me when he looked so angry. And for that, Olney beat him. It’s not his fault, sir. It’s not his fault.”

But no one was there to hear him now, and so his story did not matter. The gavel had swung down. Yet it was some small consolation, if bitter, to know that his voice still worked. If only it had worked when it mattered, coward that I am.

“When it mattered,” he whispered, “I couldn’t help my friend. I could do nothing. Not when it mattered.”

The demons in the shadows neglected to reply.

A List of Books I Read in 2022 (in [Basically] No Particular Order)

Check out previous years’ lists if you’re interested in other books I read, like last year, 2020201920182017, and 2016. These are all the books I read in 2022. If the title and author of the book are bold and in italics, that means I recommend the book. If not, either I didn’t like the book or I don’t feel it is accessible enough to recommend to everyone.

fiction

  • Plain Bad Heroines – emily m. danforth
    • Two girls at an all-girls school in 1902 become enamored with the scandalous memoirs of a young writer named Mary MacLane. They later die a gruesome death, MacLane’s book near their bodies. Fast-forward more than 100 years, and another young author has written a bestselling book on the haunted school, which is now being turned into a movie. This is the story of three modern-day heroines pursuing identity, queer self-discovery, and relationships amid the backdrop of the macabre. I thought danforth could have done a bit more with the story, but I enjoyed the book immensely.
  • The 22 Murders of Madison May – Max Berry
    • I love Max Berry’s writing, having read both Lexicon and Providence in previous years. This book isn’t quite as good as those two, but it’s still a very fun and interesting read. The story centers around a reporter who accidentally slips into a different universe and comes to realize that there are potentially infinite versions of her living different lives. However, she also learns of a man who is stalking another woman (the eponymous Madison May) through the multiverse, killing versions of her that don’t fall in love with him. It’s a wild ride.
  • The Final Girl Support Group – Grady Hendrix
    • Hendrix paints a world that takes our own world’s obsession with true crime to its logical conclusion. The main character, Lynnette Tarkington, is a member of a Final Girls Support Group—a regular meeting of women who survived serial killers and massacres. For Lynnette, the day she survived as impacted the rest of her life. She lives in near-isolation, spending all her money on protective equipment and planning elaborate methods to evade any sort of stalking or detection, fearing another attempt on her life. Then, one day, one of the women in the support group fails to show up and Lynette begins to suspect that someone out there is targeting them all, all over again.
  • The Bone Clocks – David Mitchell
    • The writer of Cloud Atlas comes up with another take on timeless existence spanning centuries, touching many lives, and winding individual narratives into a jaw-dropping tapestry of cause and effect. The story centers on Holly Sykes and her family, who unwittingly become party to a millennia-long battle between magical forces of good and evil. Written with the flair typical to a David Mitchell book.
  • Remembrance of Earth’s Past Series – Cixin Liu
  • The Three-Body Problem
  • The Dark Forest
  • Death’s End
    • A friend loaned me these books, telling me that the first was his favorite book immediately after he read it, then he read the second one and that became his favorite book, and then he read the third and it once more supplanted the hierarchy. I was skeptical, but he was right about the quality of Liu’s ideas. Nominally about an incident of first contact with an alien species and their subsequent impending invasion, the series has some of the most interesting concepts I’ve ever read about physics and metaphysics in sci-fi. It has fundamentally changed the way I think about “outer space” and what might lie beyond.
  • The Collector Series – Dot Hutchison
  • The Butterfly Garden
  • The Roses of May
  • The Summer Children
  • The Vanishing Season
    • I stumbled upon this series when searching for deeply disturbing books to read (because I am a masochist, I guess). While the first book has some especially disturbing content, Hutchison’s writing is great and her grasp of character development is phenomenal. I grew to love these characters across the series, though I do think that the series’ first installment is probably its best. It centers around a survivor of a heinous crime being interviewed about the situation by police detectives who aren’t quite sure if she is a victim or an accomplice, and she’s not exactly being forthcoming. I highly recommend this series if you want to scratch the itch of a detective-y story with strong women characters.
  • The Broken Earth Trilogy – N.K. Jemisin
  • The Obelisk Gate
  • The Stone Sky
    • Jemisin is one of the leading voices in modern speculative fiction, and this sci-fi/fantasy series blends the best of both genres. I read the first book in the series, The Fifth Season, previously and loved it. The series only gets better from there. Featuring a world broken by an ancient cataclysm, humans with the ability to use “sessapinae” to connect with the power of the earth, and disastrous “fifth seasons” that occur every so often and last for who-knows-how-long, the series answers all the questions is poses in the first book and does so with feeling.
  • Master of the Revels – Nicole Garland
    • The sequel to Garland and Neal Stephenson’s The Rise and Fall of D.O.D.O., this book continues where the first left off (SPOILERS if you haven’t read the first, which I recommend). Long story short: witches are real and use the existence of the multiverse to perform “magic,” but the advent of photography has substantially curtailed their ability to do so. The Department of Diachronic Operations (D.O.D.O.) was initiated by the U.S. government to harness the power of magic to alter history in favorable ways, but that has since been commandeered and compromised by a rogue operator. Many of the characters in the first book now operate within a counter-agency to combat the very D.O.D.O. they helped found. Master of the Revels features something I love in literature: mixed media from different characters’ perspectives, with chapters in the form of letters, diary entries, chat logs, etc. and events that span from ancient Japan to the time of Shakespeare to the modern age.
  • A Door Behind a Door – Yelena Moskovich
    • Some of the most beautiful writing in a book I didn’t truly understand. It’s the story of a Russian woman who immigrates to America before getting a phone call that brings back all the tragedy and mystery of her past. It was weird and good, but it didn’t stick with me.
  • The Anomaly Files – Michael Rutger
  • The Anomaly
  • The Possession
    • Nolan Moore runs a YouTube channel called The Anomaly Files, on which he and a small team of camera operators head to popular conspiracy-theory locales to try to prove or disprove phenomena. This is all derided by experts, of course, but Moore is hopeful that a trip to the Grand Canyon might result in a real win for his flailing channel. When he sets out to try to find a mysterious cavern mentioned by an explorer in 1909, he is unaware that success might not bring with it the positive results he wanted. The Anomaly is a horror-ish story that blends elements of Indiana Jones and The X-Files, and it is great entertainment. The Possession sees Moore and his team investigating, well, the concept of demonic possession. Both books are really fun to read and I’m awaiting the next in the (hopefully) long series.
  • Chasing Homer – Laszlo Krasznahorkai
    • Expertly written, this is nevertheless one of those literary works that I’ll only read once. It’s a collaborative effort with the story by Krasznahorkai accompanied by paintings by Max Neumann for each chapter and a musical score accessed by QR code by Miklos Szilveszter. The story is about a man on the run from assassins who lives in a present moment (because, for him, neither past nor future exist). It is frenetic in its pace, but it’s also deeply pretentious and avant-garde, so it’s not for everyone. I like that kind of stuff and it was a little too much for me to “get.”
  • 1414° — Paul Bradley Carr
    • Carr takes on Silicon Valley in this feminist tech thriller. The novel follows journalist Lou McCarthy, who has lost virtually everything important to her in her pursuit of telling the truth about the bros who run the tech world. Then, two of the men she has written about in the past are killed in very public and grotesque ways, leading to outrage from internet trolls and her own desire to find the person responsible for the deaths. It’s a good story with good writing that sometimes becomes too unbelievable and often relies on money as a deus ex machina to wrap up subplots.
  • The Need – Helen Phillips
    • I haven’t stopped thinking about this book since I read it. Molly is an archaeologist who works at The Pit, which has been producing never-before-seen fossilized plants. Then, impossible items start showing up in the strata. Then, one day when her husband is away for work and she is struggling to keep up with her own job and the needs of her children, Molly hears footsteps in the house. There are horror and thriller elements in this strange book, but it’s more than just those genres. It’s also existential, speculative, emotional… It’s weird and I love it.
  • Hawthorne and Horowitz Investigate – Anthony Horowitz
  • The Word Is Murder
  • The Sentence Is Death
    • Anthony Horowitz is one of the top modern mystery writers and has written himself as a character into these stories, accompanied by the nearly completely unlikeable ex-detective-turned-Sherlock-esque-freelancer Hawthorne. The two mysteries are pleasingly confounding until Hawthorne explains them, and I deeply enjoy the interplay between the two men.
  • Aliens Stole My Body – Bruce Coville
    • I introduced this book, which I first read in elementary school, to my own elementary-aged kids this year. It’s a fun kid’s book about a child whose father is an Atlantian with ties to many entities in the galaxy. One of those entities, a fiend known as BKR, has stolen the kid’s body, leaving his consciousness trapped in the mind of a mouthless one-eyed alien named Seymour. This galactic adventure was one of my favorites as a kid, even though it’s the fourth in the series and I never read the others. Sue me.
  • Monk and Robot Books – Becky Chambers
  • A Psalm for the Wild-Built
  • A Prayer for the Crown-Shy
    • These might be my favorite books of the year. Chambers creates a post-apocalyptic world that is somehow pleasant to live in. The conflict is all internal within the mind and soul of our main character as they struggle with identity, purpose, and meaning. I cried reading these books, and I need more. All I will tell you of the world is that the main character is a monk who sets out to find their purpose by providing tea ceremonies across the continent, and they eventually meet a robot in the woods. Oh, and robots have all left society a long time ago after becoming self-aware, with the promise to one day return and check in with humanity. Today, it seems, may be the day that promise gets fulfilled.
  • The Magic Misfits: The Fourth Suit – Neil Patrick Harris
    • My kids and I also read this book by Neil Patrick Harris. It’s the last in his Magic Misfits series, and it resolves some of the lingering mysteries that have surrounded the main characters (particularly the master magician himself, Dante). It’s a story about friendship, love, and trust. I recommend the series if you have kids.
  • Rabbits – Terry Miles
    • “Rabbits” is a game that you play but don’t discuss… except in hushed tones with others who play. It’s about finding patterns and anomalies in anything and everything: odd videos that pop up on the internet seemingly out of nowhere, misprinted signage, symbols on the backs of potato chip bags. Anything and everything can be part of the game, and it all seems to lead you on to the next clue. Iterations of the game end with a winner receiving some mysterious reward (money? power? inclusion in some secret society? who knows?). We follow narrator K, who has been obsessed with Rabbits for decades and might be just the person to solve a nagging concern whispered about in dark alleyways: something is wrong with the game this time around… something that could threaten our entire reality. I loved the premise of this book, but I felt that it didn’t quite deliver on its setup. At some point, you start worrying that maybe there are too many odd patterns to try to fit together, and then later on you see that maybe you were right.
  • Echo – Thomas Olde Heuvelt
    • This is another contender for my book of the year. Echo is written from the perspective (mostly) of a man whose long-term boyfriend is rescued from a mountain climb gone wrong. Nick, the ill-fated boyfriend, awakens from a coma to learn that his climbing partner Agustin is missing and presumed dead and his own face is horrifically disfigured, but the real horror awaits. As Sam, our narrator, struggles with memories of his own past and his shallow fears over having a disfigured boyfriend, he also grows to believe something isn’t quite right with Nick. Something has come back with him from the mountain. I loved this book and plan on reading the rest of Olde Heuvelt’s oeuvre soon.
  • Tender Is the Flesh – Agustina Bazterrica
    • I read this book for a book club I joined late in 2022. If you haven’t heard of it, it’s the story of a dystopian future in which animals have all suffered from some kind of disease that makes their meat highly toxic to humans. As a result, we now breed humans in captivity for meat. Yes, you read that right. This novel is extremely disturbing, even for someone like me who likes disturbing stories. Our main character works as second-in-command of a processing plant and is struggling to cope with the sudden death of his infant son. Bazterrica writes beautifully about awful realities and does not pull a single punch. I recommend this book, but only if you think you can stomach it.
  • The Secret History – Donna Tartt
    • Another book club read. Tartt, a friend and collegiate schoolmate of Bret Easton Ellis, tells the story of a narrator from a humble background who infiltrates a secretive, insular group of rich kids at university. They are all students of Greek taught by an eccentric professor who requires them to drop all other classes, and they bond over shared interests and feelings of superiority over their classmates. Eventually, when tragedy strikes, infighting begins and the characters devolve in tremendous and flamboyant ways.

nonfiction

  • Shape: The Hidden Geometry of Information, Biology, Strategy, Democracy, and Everything Else – Jordan Ellenberg
    • Ellenberg’s was the sole nonfiction work I read this year, but it was definitely a worthy one. A one-time math prodigy, Ellenberg takes the reader through tons of different real-life scenarios in which complex geometry has solved problems. From gaming to artificial intelligence, from gerrymandering to the spread of disease, Ellenberg shows that geometry underlies pretty much everything in the modern world. And he does so in writing that is entertaining even for laypeople like me, who are by no means math prodigies or even one-time math prodigies.

poetry

  • The Sunflower Cast a Spell to Save Us From the Void – Jackie Wang
    • This booklet of poems was a bit too weird and avant-garde for me. It didn’t feel “of a piece,” as my college professor (and NC poet laureate) Joseph Bathanti used to say.
  • Twice Alive – Forest Gander
    • This book of poetry centers around fungi and is somehow poignant and emotional. I loved it.
  • What Is Otherwise Infinite – Bianca Stone
    • Philosophical and lyrical, Stone’s poems contemplate self-identity through the lens of myth, religion, and modern life. Bianca Stone is one of the best doing it today.
  • July – Kathleen Ossip
    • These politically-bent poems center around the modern United States, with all its inherent problems and potential. The collection is good, but can venture into the self-indulgent at times.
  • Self-Portrait With Cephalopod – Kathryn Smith
    • A collection of poems about living in the current moment, when humanity is on the verge of wrecking the world for ourselves and so many other species. Self-Portrait With Cephalopod is extremely my shit and Smith’s writing is extremely poignant and moving. I highly recommend this one.

A List of Books I Read in 2021 (in [Basically] No Particular Order)

Check out previous years’ lists if you’re interested in other books I read, like last years’201920182017, and 2016. These are all the books I read in 2021. If the title and author of the book are bold and in italics, that means I recommend the book. If not, either I didn’t like the book or I don’t feel it is accessible enough to recommend to everyone.

nonfiction

  • Gory Details: Adventures from the Dark Side of Science — Erika Engelhaupt
    • Engelhaupt writes National Geographic‘s online blog “Gory Details,” and used many of the stories (and kinds of stories) that make it onto that site to create this book. It’s an interesting look at some of the “grosser” parts of science, like corpse farms and CSI-type stuff.
  • The Great Equations: Breakthroughs in Science from Pythagoras to Heisenberg — Robert P. Crease
    • This book is a good place to start for nerds who want to know more about the history of science. Crease, a science historian and philosopher, goes through 10 equations that drastically changed humans’ ideas about the world and led to a greater understanding of our universe.

fiction

  • The Cruelest Month (Chief Inspector Gamache #3) — Louise Penny
    • If you enjoy cozy mysteries, solid character development, and a dash of philosophizing about human nature, you’ll enjoy Louise Penny’s CI Gamache series. It centers around Armand Gamach, who is a Chief Inspector with Quebec’s Sûreté. He solves mysteries in the somewhat isolated town of Three Pines, where he grows to know the locals.
  • The Leaving — Tara Altebrando
    • As children, six kids were taken from their school and haven’t been seen for over a decade. Now, five of them return with hazy memories. This is a young adult fiction book, but it is equally enjoyable for adults. Coupled with the mysteries of the plot, Altebrando also plays around with the way the text is presented (it reminded me somewhat of Speak, by Laurie Halse Anderson).
  • Cloud Atlas — David Mitchell
    • You likely have heard of the Wachowski film with Tom Hanks. The book is better (though I enjoyed the film). The plot hops around in time, telling the narratives of various people who (we must infer) are all connected in some way. From centuries ago to the far future, Cloud Atlas charts one of the possible paths humanity can take in the coming ages and celebrates the human ability to adapt.
  • Fall or, Dodge in Hell — Neal Stephenson
    • Neal Stephenson is one of my favorite living authors. That’s mostly due to his ability to wrap grand, sweeping ideas in palatable, fast-paced narratives. He’s also got a reputation for not knowing how to end his stories and for being a bit, shall we say, verbose. It took me over a year to finish this novel, I think it could have been significantly shorter, and yet I still recommend it. Its central plot is about a game developer preserving his brain cryogenically in order to be “rebooted” at a later date (and, subsequently, what happens when he awakens in a new, digital space).
  • The Route of Ice & Salt — José Luis Zárate
    • This is a reinvention of the traditional Dracula story told from the perspective of the captain of the Demeter (the ship tasked with transporting boxes of soil from Transylvania… and maybe something else). In José Luis Zárate’s reimagining, the queer captain brims with desire for his men, unable to express it due to his station and duties. Instead, he pens the journal we read, detailing the ultimate demise of his ship.
  • The Silence — Don DeLillo
    • Basically, this novel (more of a novella, really) revolves around all our technology going dark during (gasp) Super Bowl Sunday. It’s undeniably well-written, but it has not stayed in my mind at all. I barely remember reading it, so I can’t recommend it.
  • The Outsider — Stephen King
    • Yeah, it’s another Stephen King book. This one might be my favorite after It. Now a TV series directed by Jason Bateman, the novel centers around one impossible event: all evidence (including DNA) points to a local little league coach committing a heinous murder, yet he is also on video literal states away at the exact same moment of the death. So what’s going on?
  • XX: A Novel, Graphic — Rian Hughes
    • This is a contender for my book of the year. Hughes is a graphic designed by trade who also decided to become a skilled writer because SOMETIMES GOD GIVES OTHER PEOPLE TOO MANY FREAKIN’ TALENTS. Ok, I took a breath. Anyway, the book is about humanity receiving evidence of alien life, dubbed The Signal, and what we do with that information. There are some parts I would have trimmed, but overall this is a mindblowing work. Highly recommend.
  • A Head Full of Ghosts — Paul Tremblay
    • One of the best ghost stories / possession stories I’ve ever read. It’s a compassionate look at a family with a mentally ill daughter struggling to find any solution that works. And it’s also got a hell of an ending. Just read it and see.
  • the_atmospherians — Alex McElroy
    • Following a spectacular rise and unfair fall from the public eye, a one-time influencer named Sasha Marcus is convinced by her best friend to start a retreat/camp to rid men of their toxic masculinity. In a surreal version of our world, men have started forming spontaneous groups to perform tasks (sometimes violent, sometimes as simple as changing tires on an unsuspecting person’s car). Deeply weird and funny, McElroy’s novel pops with precise dialogue and phenomenal character development.
  • Cari Mora — Thomas Harris
    • From the mind that created Hannibal Lecter, Cari Mora is the story of a young South American woman who escaped violence in her home country. She’s the caretaker of a house once owned by Pablo Escobar and which is supposed to have hidden treasure somewhere inside. The only issue is that a psychopath is on the hunt for that money. Thomas Harris is a MASTER of dialogue and pacing. He makes you turn the page.
  • The Fifth Season (The Broken Earth #1) — N. K. Jemisin
    • Half fantasy, half sci-fi, this book breaks all the rules in the best ways. Told from three perspectives, the story is set in a world in which some humans are born with “sessapinae” that can draw power from the Earth itself. This is understandably scary to regular folks, as it can cause serious environmental damage. Oh, and also every now and then there is a “fifth season” in which the world just sorta undergoes a cataclysmic, life-threatening upheaval. You should read this even if the synopsis doesn’t seem interesting to you. It’s that good.
  • Stranger Things Happen — Kelly Link
    • This short story collection highlights why Link is considered one of the living masters of the form. It’s weird fiction that features modern horror stories like The Specialist’s Hat, in which two young girls are left alone in a house with a babysitter. The collection is wildly strange in ways that will be enjoyable to anyone who likes horror that makes you think.
  • The Ghost Sequences — A. C. Wise
    • I cannot stop raving about this book. Easily the best short story collection I’ve read in years, it’s exactly my type of horror. From a tale told through descriptions of pieces of scrimshaw to a story in which military vets go on a last mission to secure a mysterious substance that connects them with some ancient presence, The Ghost Sequences might be my book of the year.
  • The King of Infinite Space — Lyndsay Faye
    • This is a retelling of Shakespeare’s Hamlet in modern New York. But it’s magical, queer, feminist, and impeccably written. I loved it. Might be the best novel I read this year, actually.
  • Providence — Max Barry
    • Max Barry doesn’t miss. I loved his book Lexicon, and in this novel, he branches out to space-centric sci-fi. It’s the story of a crew aboard an intelligent, AI-driven ship tasked with destroying an alien species that has waged war on humanity. Two years into their mission, the crew starts unraveling mentally.
  • Devolution: A Firsthand Account of the Rainier Sasquatch Massacre — Max Brooks
    • The author who wrote World War Z switches up from zombies to Bigfoot in this novel. I went into it not really expecting it to be super great. However, it surprised me. I don’t normally like these kinds of books, or maybe I’m just biased, but I enjoyed this one. It’s told through recovered journal entries from a woman who moved into an eco-friendly smart community in Washington. After Mt. Rainier unexpectedly erupts, the community is isolated and starts seeing signs of… something… in the woods.

poetry

  • Dear Specimen: Poems — W. J. Herbert
    • Split into five sections, this poetry collection is written from the perspective of a dying parent to her daughter. Herbert weaves in themes of grief, ecology, and humanity’s place in the natural world. It’s a collection that asks if our species deserves to survive in a world in which we have caused such widespread damage. Heavy, heavy, stuff.
  • Nature Poem — Tommy Pico
    • I debated whether or not to recommend this one, but felt that it isn’t as accessible as I’d prefer. Tommy Pico’s book-long poem is about being an American Indian who can’t bring himself to write a nature poem. It focuses on his identity as a queer, city-dwelling urbanite who still struggles to deal with white colonialism in America and fights against the stereotypes about what Native American poetry has to be. I liked it but didn’t love it, and that’s okay. It’s a deeply personal poem that showcases his poetic prowess, but it just wasn’t for me.

graphic novels/comics

  • From Hell — Alan Moore / Eddie Campbell
    • Moore’s take on the Jack the Ripper killings, this graphic novel is legendary and inspired the movie starring Johnny Depp. If you love true crime, Alan Moore, graphic novels, or just incredibly good storytelling, this is a must-read.
  • Top 10, Book 1 — Alan Moore / Gene Ha
    • Another Moore graces the list. This one centers on a police force in a city in which everyone has superpowers. It’s genre-bending, world-hopping Moore at his usual antics.
  • Providence — Alan Moore / Jacen Burrows
    • Look, Alan Moore is the GOAT. Don’t complain that I mostly read his stuff. This is his take on the world H. P. Lovecraft. It follows a journalist who ends up intertwining himself with an up and coming writer (Lovecraft) in a tale that twists and turns through so many Lovecraftian stories. It’s perfect.
  • Nowhere Men, Vol. 1: Fates Worse Than Death — Eric Stephenson et. al.
    • This one is hard to reccomend, as it was virtually canceled and doesn’t end the narrative. However, it’s SO GOOD. The story focuses on four scientists modeled after The Beatles whose work has made science, as the kids say, “hip.” Also, there is a crew on the International Space Station that starts developing weird symptoms. There’s a lot going on here, it’s all really cool, and it’s very sad that I will not be able to see how the story ends. I cry.
  • Green River Killer: A True Detective Story — Jeff Jensen / Jonathan Case
    • Jensen’s father was a detective who worked on the Green River Killer case, and this graphic novel follows him as he pursues the villain and, later, questions him. It’s true crime at its finest. If you’re like me and my wife and listen to a bunch of true crime podcasts, this is an excellent graphic novel to check out.

indie books for reedsy

I have started reviewing books by independent authors on Reedsy. You can find my profile, with all my reviews, here. You can click the titles below to go to my full review of each book.

A List of Books I Read in 2020 (in [Basically] No Particular Order)

Check out previous years’ lists if you’re interested in other books I read, like last year’s20182017, and 2016. These are all the books I read in 2020. If the title and author of the book are bold and in italics, that means I recommend the book. If not, either I didn’t like the book or I don’t feel it is accessible enough to recommend to everyone.

nonfiction

  • Why You Should Read Children’s Books, Even Though You Are So Old and Wise — Katherine Rundell
    • Not a bad read, but ultimately not one I’d read again. It’s a quick look at all the ways young adult literature is perfectly acceptable for older adults.
  • An Introduction to the Three Volumes of Karl Marx’s Capital–Michael Heinrich
    • Hello, I’m Mike and I’m a leftist who has not actually read Capital. But this intro is very informative and interesting, if you’re into that sort of thing.
  • Society of the Spectacle — Guy Debord
    • We live in a society.
  • The Soul of an Octopus: A Surprising Exploration Into the Wonder of Consciousness — Sy Montgomery
    • A beautiful story about Sy Montgomery’s experiences with octopuses. Not only is the prose moving, but there is considerable evidence of a consciousness that has evolved along completely different lines than our own.
  • Something Deeply Hidden: Quantum Worlds and the Emergence of Spacetime — Sean Carroll
    • I’m a sucker for popular books on quantum gravity and deep physics. Carroll holds to the Everettian (or “Many Worlds”) version of quantum physics, which is the field’s most austere theory. He makes a good case for it here.
  • Hallucinations — Oliver Sacks
    • I keep thinking about this book for a variety of reasons. An in-depth look at various types of hallucinations that can plague humans, the book is compassionate toward the mentally ill and provides some fascinating insights.
  • The Chalk Circle: Intercultural Prizewinning Essays — Tara Lynn Masih (ed.)
    • Good premise, but not the most enjoyable read. As with all collections, it’s a mixed bag.
  • Zwicky: The Outcast Genius Who Unmasked the Universe — John Johnson, Jr.
    • It’s strange to me that we don’t hear more about Fritz Zwicky, as he is the physicist who originally popularized the term “supernova.” This book is a well-written biography of one of science’s semi-forgotten giants.
  • The Wild Braid: A Poet Reflects on a Century in the Garden — Stanley Kunitz
    • It’s a ruminative conversation with a renowned poet in the latter stages of his life. What can I say?
  • Simulacra and Simulation — Jean Beaudrillard
    • I have no idea what Beaudrillard is talking about. I am a dumb.
  • Virga & Bone: Essays From Dry Places — Craig Childs
    • Craig Childs writes beautifully about the desert, gleaning meaning from the driest, most life-hostile climes in America. This book is super short, but it sticks with you like a cloying, purifying heat.
  • The Collected Schizophrenias: Essays — Esmé Weijun Wang
    • Wang herself has a diagnosis on the schizophrenic spectrum of mental illnesses. She catalogs her struggle, bravely redefining and clarifying what it means to be mentally ill in these essays. As popular culture likes to treat schizophrenic people as inherently dangerous, this collection of heartbreaking essays provides a stark contrast to the fare we’re normally served.
  • Time Is the Thing a Body Moves Through — T Fleischmann
    • Honestly, it’s hard to even categorize this “essay.” It’s part poetry, part biography, and entirely an ode to changing relationships with our own bodies and sexualities.
  • Welcome to the Universe: An Astrophysical Tour — Neil deGrasse Tyson
    • Maybe it’s my personal distaste for Tyson’s public persona, but I just couldn’t get too into this book. It’s good enough, but there are better popular works on astrophysics, IMO.
  • Bourbon: The Rise, Fall, and Rebirth of an American Whiskey — Fred Minnick
    • I love bourbon, and this book is like the bourbon Bible.

fiction

  • Kraken — China Miéville
    • CM is a brilliant writer who comes up with entirely unpredictable worlds. This one’s about a giant squid that vanishes from its museum. Literally vanishes. Then, we are introduced to a secret side of London, where magic is possible and everything is dangerous.
  • The City & the City — China Miéville
    • Another phenomenal book by CM. The protagonist is a detective who lives in an Eastern European city-state called Besźel. It is located, geographically, in the same place as another city, Ul Qoma. By law, citizens of one city cannot do anything to acknowledge the existence of the other city. The catch is that our protagonist finds the body of a woman who was seemingly killed in his city but lived in Ul Qoma. This book is super strange and very good.
  • Lexicon — Max Barry
    • Loved this book. A secret society trains young kids to be “poets.” The kids learn how to manipulate people with words and specific sounds. What follows from that premise is a thrilling ride as we watch two narrative threads merge. Vartix velkor mannik wissick. Read this book.
  • Magpie Murders — Anthony Horowitz
    • A good whodunnit murder mystery that unfolds as the editor of a new book (The Magpie Murders) begins to suspect some foul play in her own personal life.
  • The Complete Writings of Art Smith, the Bird Boy of Fort Wayne, Edited by Michael Martone — Michael Martone
    • A fictional biography of the inventor of skywriting. It’s very weird, very avant-garde, and a fun read if you are into fiction with weird structure and multimedia elements.
  • Three — Ann Quin
    • My first Ann Quin. This one’s also avant-garde and plays around with structure a lot. Ostensibly, it’s the story of a couple who recently had a live-in partner (a poly-triad, I suppose). However, she has committed suicide before the novel begins.
  • Rag: Stories  — Maryse Meijer
    • Maryse Meijer is brilliant. I liked Rag, but felt that not all the stories landed for me. Still, it’s worth reading after you read her novel The Seventh Mansion.
  • Exhalation — Ted Chiang
    • Somehow, Ted Chiang’s short story collections are always all hits. The titular story is about a world of robots who are powered by air. Every breath diminishes the overall life-giving energy of their universe. The main character discovers this and ruminates on the implications of a universe that will expire.
  • The Seventh Mansion — Maryse Meijer
    • A haunting, eerily beautiful character study about a boy who has a sexual attraction to bones and is involved with ecoterrorist groups. I cannot recommend this book enough. It was so good.
  • Count Luna — Alexander Lernet-Holenia
    • Maybe I’m biased against older classics. I don’t know. But this book failed to grab me at all. It’s about one man’s fear of reprisal after he is awarded the estate of another man (Count Luna) who is sent to a concentration camp.
  • The Gnome Stories — Ander Monson
    • Surreal mundanity of the Lynchian sort. This collection of 11 stories is primarily about characters who are incredibly isolated and lonely, and who do incredibly strange things.
  • House of Leaves — Mark. Z. Danielewski
    • I re-read HoL this year. It’s one of my favorite books and played a big part in getting me addicted to so-called “ergodic” fiction. If you want a more in-depth look at it, check out my old House of Leaves review.
  • The Scarlet Gospels — Clive Barker
    • This is my first Clive Barker book. It scratched a horror itch for me in a much-needed way. We follow, among other characters, the illustrious Hell Priest himself, Pinhead (don’t call him that to his face), on his quest to become ruler of Hell. Anyway, read the book. Barker has such sights to show you.
  • The Haunting of Hill House — Shirley Jackson
    • A classic, and deserving of the title.
  • The Dead Zone — Stephen King
    • I’m admittedly late to the Stephen King party. I haven’t even read The Stand yet. If you don’t know, this one follows a man who, following a car accident that left him in a coma, can now see the future when he touches people.
  • Horrorstör — Grady Hendrix
    • What if IKEA, but scary?
  • Her Body and Other Parties — Carmen Maria Machado
    • An absolutely phenomenal, wild, unabashedly feminist, raw collection of amazing short stories. Don’t miss this one. I NEED to read more from Machado.
  • The Last Wish (The Witcher, # 0.5) — Andrzej Sapkowski
    • I love The Witcher. This is the first book in the series, and I was a bit taken aback by its format. I actually really like the book, which is a collection of stories about Geralt, but I think it’s only a recommendation if you’re into medieval fantasy or liked the show/videogame.
  • Stories of Your Life and Others — Ted Chiang
    • This is the short story collection that contains the story that hit film Arrival was based on. But all of the stories are special. Chiang is an amazing writer.
  • Six of Crows (Six of Crows, #1) — Leigh Bardugo
    • My wife has been begging me to read this series for a long time. I finally obliged, and man, she was right. Fantasy in a really cool world that contains Grisha, or those who have innate magic abilities that are outlawed. Our crew of six characters has to break into the world’s most impenetrable prison, then break out. Tense stuff.
  • The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul (Dirk Gently, #2) — Douglas Adams
    • The second book about Dirk Gently and his Holistic Detective Agency. This one involves an insane plotline that includes Norse gods, nursing homes, and even a locked-room murder scenario. All while being very funny in true Douglas Adams style.
  • Earthsong (Native Tongue #3) — Suzette Haden Elgin
    • Third book in the Native Tongue series. A must-read feminist sci-fi trilogy about a future in which 12 families called “linguists” hold a monopoly on learning alien languages and conversing with our galactic neighbors.
  • The Judas Rose (Native Tongue #2) — Suzette Haden Elgin
    • Second book in the Native Tongue series. A must-read feminist sci-fi trilogy about a future in which 12 families called “linguists” hold a monopoly on learning alien languages and conversing with our galactic neighbors.
  • The Beautiful Mystery (Chief Inspector Armand Gamache, #8) — Louise Penny
    • Inspector Gamache investigates an apparent murder in a monastery.
  • The Reservoir Tapes — Jon McGregor
    • Several different characters in a small town deal with the fact that a young girl has gone missing. I probably need to read McGregor’s Reservoir 13, which this collection is supposed to be a prequel to, before making a recommendation.
  • The Snowman (Harry Hole #7) — Jo Nesbø
    • Not terrible, not great. I mean, the inspector’s name is Harry Hole. Harry. Hole.
  • False Bingo: Stories — Jac Jemc
    • Another hit list of great and strange short stories. The NY Times said this: “Combines the otherworldliness of Jeff VanderMeer’s “Annihilation,” the menacing irony of Shirley Jackson and the cold feminist fury of Margaret Atwood. I’d agree on all counts.
  • The Warlow Experiment — Alix Nathan
    • I don’t think I’ll ever stop thinking about this book. The plot revolves around a man named Warlow, who accepts an aristocrat’s experiment. Warlow will stay in the isolated basement of the aristocrat’s home for seven years, with no contact outside meal deliveries (using only a trolley). Haunting, terrifying, strange, and yet beautifully written.
  • Valerie; or, The Faculty of Dreams — Sara Stridsberg
    • This one went far over my head.
  • The Last Word (The Spellmans, #6) — Lisa Lutz
    • Yeah, it’s weird that I started this series on book number six, but it worked okay. The Spellmans are a family detective agency with lots of problems. Lisa Lutz shares my love of footnotes and seems to have a blast writing these books. I know I had a blast reading this one.
  • Theory of Shadows — Paolo Maurensig
    • A fictional reimagining of the real-life death of chess master Alexander Alekhine. A bit too pretentious for my liking.
  • The Grownup — Gillian Flynn
    • A conwoman masquerading as a psychic starts “helping” a woman who believes a ghost inhabits her home and is causing her stepson to become frighteningly violent. Soon, the conwoman begins to believe as well.
  • Springtime: A Ghost Story — Michelle de Kretser
    • This one stars a young woman who has recently married a divorced father. She takes walks around her neighborhood with her dog, and she spots a garden that seems detached from reality. It’s a ghost story of sorts, but honestly it just never felt right to me.

poetry

  • Spring Garden: New and Selected Poems — Fred Chappell
    • Not a huge fan of these poems or the underlying structure (each section corresponding to part of a garden Chappell is creating with his wife). I enjoyed his collection Backsass more.
  • Native Species — Todd Davis
    • Beautiful poems about the natural world and the natural order of life.
  • Autobiography of Red — Anne Carson
    • A poem/novel that retells the story of the 10th Labor of Heracles, but from the “monster” Geryon’s perspective.
  • Half-light: Collected Poems 1965-2016 — Frank Bidart
    • I mean, it won the national book award. Great poems here, amazing play with language. Some hit and land better than others.
  • Run Wild and Be: A Collection of Poems & Stories Inspired by Wild Spaces & Endurance Running — Sydney Zester
    • Exactly what it says on the tin. However, I wasn’t all that impressed with the style of these poems. Just not my cup of tea (which isn’t surprising, as neither is running).
  • Sparrow Envy — J. Drew Lanham
    • One of the best poetry collections I read this year. J. Drew Lanham is a black man who has a singular love: birdwatching. These poems reflect all the feeling, all the complexities, of navigating that world.
  • Nervous System: Poems — Rosalie Moffett
    • These were good poems, mostly, but the material didn’t stick with my like some of the others on this list.
  • Whiskey Words & a Shovel II — R. H. Sin
    • I hated this collection.
  • The Mobius Strip Club of Grief — Bianca Stone
    • Interesting premise, but the poems felt too gimmicky much of the time.
  • Reconnaissance — Carl Phillips
    • It became clear to me that I was not Phillips’ target audience with these poems. They were beautiful but spoke a language I couldn’t translate.
  • Backsass: Poems — Fred Chappell
    • Better than the Spring Garden poems. I might revisit this collection some day, but they didn’t stand out particularly well for me.
  • Tsunami vs. the Fukushima 50: Poems — Lee Ann Roripaugh
    • Many poetry collections that are too on-the-nose about their structure or what binds the poems together can turn me off. This collection did that, but there are some gems here as well.
  • Restoring Sacred Art — Joseph Bathanti
    • I studied under former NC poet laureate Bathanti, and I revisit this collection of his every few years. “Speedball eyes” on a ventriloquist dummy. I mean, god, the imagery.
  • All Day I Dream About Sirens — Domenica Martinello
    • One of, if not THE, best collections I read this year. I urge you to read these. Martinello is an up and coming master of the art form.

graphic novels/comics

  • Sobek — James Stokoe
    • After reading Stokoe’s Orc Stain, I checked this one out. A shorter comic, Sobek is a brief look at crocodile-god Sobek’s reaction to his temple being profaned by followers of Set. It contains the incredible artwork you see on the cover, which is Stokoe’s unique style.
  • Crossed +100 Volume 1 — Alan Moore
    • I’m a sucker for anything Alan Moore. This one is set a century into the future, after a zombie-like outbreak of “Crossed.” The story is wild, the world imaginative and supremely detailed. It’s pure Moore.
  • Clue: Candlestick — Dash Shaw
    • An ode to the board game, Clue: Candlestick is among the most unique graphic novels I’ve read. It includes puzzles you can work out to determine the culprit long before the final reveal. Really interesting structure and style. It took me back to being a kid and reading comics in the back of the car on family vacations.

Light in All Its Forms

On Picture Made By My Hand with the Assistance of Light, by Walead Beshty
[[[link to the artwork that inspired this poem: https://www.guggenheim.org/artwork/31255]]]

i. ice and its qualities // regeneration
the way ice breaks apart between stubborn teeth,
its shatters milk-white, bleeding into
translucence.
much worse the groaning slush of iceberg
against iceberg,
mother nature’s own bad habit,
the habitats of polar bears and elephant seals
caught in the liminal space,
the voids,
the cavities.
the animals live between gnashing molars,
bicuspids of resplendent bifrost,
and we forget, in the end, that we
are animals too.

ii. deterioration // sanctification
stretch the plastic trash bag to its limit,
feeling the tension in this artificial skin
black to disguise its contents,
black to hide what light can’t see.
the way rays of light break apart on its
vantablack,
bounce back, radiate heat.
the way rays/streams, maybe
even eddies of light
become dots, fragments, shatter
across the membrane as if
across water.

given enough time, the sun
will burn even plastic into dust,
motes of floating shale
bleached white in the heat of a
red giant
shaking off the last
of its struggling photons,
readying itself for
sleep.

iii. interiority // glorification
what’s weird with
light is its properties,
both a wave and a particle
at once.
what’s weird
is the fact that
electromagnetism extends
across a spectrum,
demarcated only by
the rapidity of
its vibrations.

on one end, sound waves
are just light
at a slower pace.
stick your toe in the deeper end
and touch the X-rays
as they touch beyond the blackbody
radiation that pours from your own
meaty
self, touch
the hidden parts
bones    organs    tumors
and lift the roof of your frame,
expose the underpinnings,
reveal the harsh truth:

there is no self,
only light in all its forms.

A List of Books I Read in 2019 (in [Basically] No Particular Order)

THIS WORKS THE SAME as it did last yearin 2017, and in 2016. The list includes all the books I read in 2019 and each entry has a brief synopsis to give you an inkling for how I feel about it. If the title and author of the book are bold and in italics, that means I recommend the book. If not, either I didn’t like the book or I don’t feel it is accessible enough to recommend to everyone. The synopsis should clarify this.

nonfiction

skcompanion

  • The Stephen King Companion: Four Decades of Fear From the Master of Horror—George Beahm
    • This book capped off 2018’s Year of Stephen King for me. A comprehensive exploration of King’s dynasty of popular fiction, the book is a little long. It is an obsessive fan’s discussion of their favorite author, and it can be… too much if that’s not what you’re looking for. If it is what you’re looking for, then have at it.

universewithin

  • The Universe Within: Discovering the Common History of Rocks, Planets, and People—Neil Shubin
    • Written by paleontologist and evolutionary biologist Neil Shubin, The Universe Within is a book about how cosmic evolution has real impacts on our lives. It’s a melding together of Big History with the history of life on our little speck in the midst of a vast ocean of nothingness, and it is fantastic.

beyondinfinity

  • Beyond Infinity: An Expedition to the Outer Limits of Mathematics—Eugenia Cheng
    • Exactly what it says on the tin. Mathematician Eugenia Cheng (Scientist in Residence at the School of the Art Institute in Chicago and a researcher in higher-dimensional category theory) takes us through the study of infinity in a more cogent way than a book that will make its appearance elsewhere on this list (Everything and More, by David Foster Wallace). The fact that I rank this one higher than DFW’s is a reflection of two things: Cheng is actually a mathematician, and her explanation is much clearer and more easily understandable. Read this if you want to know about how there are different-sized infinities, and how technically there are more numbers between 0 and 1 than there are whole numbers (!).

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  • Everything is Under Control: Conspiracies, Cults, and Cover-ups—Robert Anton Wilson
    • I’ve wanted to read Wilson’s Illuminatus! trilogy for a while now, but have been unable to get hold of a copy. I ventured into this nonfiction encyclopedia he wrote about conspiracy theories (both proven and out-there, bonkers stuff) and had fun with it. However, it’s… an encyclopedia. Some of the entries are really interesting, others are a trudge. It’s really hit-or-miss.

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  • Words, Words, Words—David Crystal
    • I doubt linguistics is a particularly pressing interest of most people reading this list. However, I LOVED this book. Crystal is a man who loves words, language, the evolution of language, and everything that is captured inside a word (its sounds, shapes, grammar, etc.). He brings his joy into this work and makes you feel it as well.

the order of time

  • The Order of Time—Carlo Rovelli
    • As one might expect, this book is about the order of time. Specifically, it is about new developments in physics that change the way we think of time as an entity. An expert on loop quantum gravity theory and (oddly enough) the philosopher Anaximander, Rovelli is an Italian physicist who illuminates these difficult concepts for the layperson like you and me. For instance, he talks about how heat is really the only concept that has an arrow of time in physics. All other equations are reversible, but the Second Law of Thermodynamics means that energy transfers from higher-energy objects to lower-energy objects (i.e. things get colder as they lose energy to their surroundings). But… under Einsteinian relativity, there is no “true” time. There is no single “now,” but such a concept depends upon the observer’s perception as warped by gravity’s influence on spacetime. Check this book out if any of that interests you.

sevenbrief

  • Seven Brief Lessons on Physics—Carlo Rovelli
    • This is another, earlier work of Rovelli’s. Both books are very short, and this one basically gives the reader a brief tutorial through seven aspects of modern physics. Einsteinian gravitation, quantum physics, cosmology, etc. They are all covered in short, pleasing passages that are surprisingly easy to read.

babel

  • Babel No More: The Search for the World’s Most Extraordinary Language Learners—Michael Erard
    • Erard takes us on a trip across the world to understand people who “know” dozens of languages. Though the book is well-written, unfortunately, it ends rather disappointingly. And it seems more concerned with Erard’s own journey and issues finding a truly impressive polyglot. He teases different ideas about how these learners hone their craft, but at the end of the day, the book seems to become nothing more than a window into incredibly weird people. Which is not what I was signing up for, really. The beginning gives the impression that we’re going to find answers.

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  • I’ll Be Gone in the Dark: One Woman’s Obsessive Search for the Golden State Killer—Michelle McNamara
    • You’ve probably heard about this book before. Michelle McNamara, the late wife of comedian Patton Oswalt, was a crime writer before her untimely death in 2016. Published posthumously from her extensive notes, this book details her search for the Golden State Killer who terrorized California in the 1970s and ’80s. Remarkably, the killer was finally caught after McNamara passed away, and some of the theories she posited in her notes were proven correct. Everything good you’ve heard about this book is right.

physicsfringe

  • Physics on the Fringe: Circlons, Smoke Rings, and Alternative Theories of Everything—Margaret Wertheim
    • Y’all, this book is wild. Mostly about Jim Carter and his Circlon Theory (in which he replaces atoms, quarks, fields, etc. with “circlons” as fundamental particles), Wertheim’s book discusses a host of alternative physics theories. As a scientist and science writer, Wertheim appreciates the skepticism of these alternative theorists (some would say pseudoscientists) and notes that they often are otherwise highly intelligent and capable people who just believe very strange things in certain areas. Thoroughly interesting and, I think, respectful to this group of people rather than the point-and-laugh send-up it could have been in less capable hands.

everythingandmore

  • Everything and More: A Compact History of Infinity—David Foster Wallace
    • It hurts me not to recommend a DFW book, but Eugenia Cheng did it better (above). This history is interesting, centers around Georg Cantor (father of set theory and influential thinker re: infinite sets), and has all the hallmarks of the DFW I love, footnotes and all. But it is not compact and is in fact overly circuitous. You get the sense that, despite his constant addresses to the reader stating otherwise, Wallace was not actually trying to make the subject matter easy to understand and was, in fact, obfuscating it needlessly.

fortunateuniv

  • A Fortunate Universe: Life in a Finely Tuned Cosmos—Geraint F. Lewis and Luke A. Barnes
    • Lewis and Barnes are two physicists who lecture together about the fine-tuning of our Universe (the fact that minor changes in fundamental values of things [like the electron’s mass] would have massive effects on a macro-level). One of them is a theist, the other is not, but both think fine-tuning is a fascinating area of modern physics ripe for discussion and discovery. This is a contender for my BOOK OF THE YEAR.

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  • Hinduism: A Beginner’s Guide—Klaus K. Klostermaier
    • Yeah, the author has an unfortunate set of initials. I dunno. I picked up this book on a whim because I was curious about Hinduism and had not read anything about it, really, other than grossly oversimplified blurbs in textbooks. This book is a good beginner’s guide that goes through the various texts, traditions, and modern issues surrounding Hinduism. Probably a niche recommendation, though, to a Western audience.

thegranddesign

  • The Grand Design—Stephen Hawking and Leonard Mlodinow
    • This book goes over material that is similar to A Fortunate Universe (above), but without the emphasis on the discussion between theism and atheism. A more general walk through modern cosmological theories and evidence, this work from Hawking and Mlodinow focuses more on the naturalist perspective of our Universe’s structure and history.

101quantum

  • 101 Quantum Questions: What You Need to Know About the World You Can’t See—Kenneth W. Ford
    • Virtually every question you can think of regarding quantum physics is answered thoroughly in this book, in a language that is accessible yet informative. Ford, an America physicist who formerly served as CEO and Executive Director of the American Institute of Physics, illuminates subjects like wave-particle duality, Schroedinger’s wave equation, the difference between up and down quarks, particle spin, etc. If you’ve ever been interested in quantum physics, pick this book up pronto!

adventalgorithm

  • The Advent of the Algorithm: The Idea That Rules the World—David Berlinski
    • This was one of the few books I read this year that I truly disliked. Berlinski ostensibly wants to convey the history and import of the algorithmic thinking that (kind of) started with Leibniz and eventually led to modern computers, but his prose is ridiculously purple. He seems more concerned about masturbatorily stroking his own ego with strange tangential stories about him explaining math to plebs over fine wine in France (yeah, that’s a real digression he takes for… no reason) than with actually explaining his points. Avoid this one.

hiddenreality

  • The Hidden Reality: Parallel Universes and the Deep Laws of the Cosmos—Brian Greene
    • Greene is an influential physicist who made some strides in string theory working on Calabi-Yau shapes. In this work, he discusses the science behind many-worlds hypotheses, including bubble universes, holograms, and simulations. Far from science-fiction, Green shows us why some physicists are starting to take seriously the idea that our Universe might be one among (possibly infinitely) many.

otherminds

  • Other Minds: The Octopus, the Sea, and the Deep Origins of Consciousness—Peter Godfrey-Smith
    • This work discusses the intelligence of cephalopods like octopuses and cuttlefish, which seem to have developed advanced brains along a separate evolutionary trajectory to ours. Highly interesting, Godfrey-Smith’s work delves into the emerging social structures at a site known as “Octopolis,” in which normally solitary octopuses, due to environmental factors, are becoming more sociable.

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  • The Book of Barely Imagined Beings: A 21st Century Bestiary—Caspar Henderson
    • Henderson’s book compiles a list of interesting creatures, from the axolotl to the yeti crab and many more besides. He uses these animals to discuss key elements of, believe it or not, humanity: what the animals can do that we can’t, how both our species and theirs adapts to its habitat, relationships between these animals and the planet, etc. It is all very interesting and well written.

fiercetethers

  • All the Fierce Tethers—Lia Purpura
    • All the Fierce Tethers is a collection of essays that was great, but which I struggle to recommend to everyone. If you like essays of nonfiction, specifically observational essays, then this is for you. Purpura has won awards for her essays in the past, and her prose is impeccable. Topics in this one include eagles and their relationship with the USA, a motel room’s stained quilt, the concept of irony, and more.

fiction

watershipdown

  • Watership Down—Richard Adams
    • A much-beloved tale of rabbits and their fight for survival, Richard Adam’s novel lived up to the hype. You know I’m a sucker for books that have their own mythologies, languages, and anthropomorphic nuances.

madeupman

  • The Made-Up Man—Joseph Scapellato
    • Ultimately a novel about art, its purpose, and its effects on artists, The Made-Up Man is a solid debut from Scapellato. The book is written from the perspective of Stanley, who has agreed to watch his uncle’s apartment in Prague. Soon, it becomes obvious to Stanley that he is just a pawn in another one of his uncle’s strange and inscrutable art projects.

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  • Ghost Wall—Sarah Moss
    • My first Sarah Moss book, this novel was incredibly good. The narrator is an English teenager whose father has dragged her and her mother to a university project. An amateur anthropologist, of sorts, her father is obsessed with the ancient English inhabitants. Her family and the university students essentially live for the summer as ancients. As we read on, Moss develops a growing unease that settles into every sentence. We know the narrator’s father is bad, but we only truly understand his vileness as we read to the end.

machine

  • Machine—Susan Steinberg
    • This book is about a young girl who recalls a summer in which another girl drowned in a local watering hole. The group of teens at the center of the novel are all children of wealthy families, mixed with a few townies. If I’m being honest, the interesting nature of the experimental poetic-prose in which the novel is written makes the plot seem more captivating than it actually is.

theremainder

  • The Remainder—Alia Trabucco Zeran
    • Shortlisted for the Man Booker Prize, The Remainder is a sharp, emotional book about two friends living in the aftermath of dictatorship in Chile. The title comes from one character’s constant subtracting of all the dead people he knows in his head, his aim to arrive at some number that will make sense of the world. A friend’s mother dies abroad and desires to be buried in Chile, but her body is lost in transit. The two (along with the motherless friend) go searching for the body, their journey an allegory for modern Chilean life.

theparade

  • The Parade—Dave Eggers
    • Only the second Eggers book I’ve read, The Parade is about two contractors for an international construction firm. They are tasked with building a road through an unnamed war-torn country so that the victorious government can host a parade across the newly unified nation. The two are opposite personalities and do not get along, leading to shenanigans and moral quandaries about the nature of their job and the war economy.

tokyo zodiac murders

  • The Tokyo Zodiac Murders—Soji Shimada
    • I hate to be sacrilegious against Shimada, who is known as the veritable King of Japanese locked-room mysteries, but The Tokyo Zodiac Murders was a middling mystery at best, for me. It kept my interest, but I felt (as I often do with translated works) that the writing was stilted and something of the voice and passion was lost in translation. Still, check it out if you are an avid fan of mysteries or crime novels. There is a reason Shimada is so highly regarded, and the plot of this one was, when it comes down to it, fascinating.

dogsymphony

  • Dog Symphony—Sam Munson
    • If you love weird fiction like I do, you need to check out this work from Sam Munson. The main character is an expert on prison architecture who has been called to Buenos Aires by a colleague. Once there, he meets a conundrum: his colleague is nowhere to be found, dogs roam the street en masse at night, and a strange governmental entity beginning to poke its nose into the world. Utterly baffling in a beautiful way.

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  • Native Tongue—Suzette Haden Elgin (possible novel of the year)
    • The fact that I haven’t heard of this book is an absolute travesty. Set in a dystopic future in which women have no rights, Elgin’s novel features a set of 13 families known as the linguists. These families are tasked with learning alien (literally) languages. But, secretly, the women of the linguist families have been working on a language for women only. Elgin, an actual linguist herself, apparently believed that language literally shapes our reality, so the end goal of the women in the novel is to change their subservience by virtue of crafting a new language. HIGHLY recommend.

neuromance

  • Neuromancer—William Gibson
    • I finally read this classic, set in a cyberpunk future. I probably don’t need to say much more, given that this book is legendary.

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  • Look at the Birdie: Short Fiction—Kurt Vonnegut (maybe a recommend)
    • This one is hard for me to categorize. Like most collections of stories, I tend not to recommend these kinds of works because the stories are often hit-or-miss. But when Vonnegut hits, he HITS. The best stories in this one, in my humble opinion, are A Song for Selma, King and Queen of the Universe, and The Petrified Ants.

housekeeper

  • The Housekeeper and the Professor—Yōko Ogawa
    • If I had not read some of the other books on this list in 2019, this one might have snagged my Novel of the Year designation. The premise is simple: a housekeeper and her son grow to know and love a man who used to be a professor of mathematics until an accident in the 1970s left him with about 90 minutes of memory. In other words, he only remembers his life up to the moment of that accident, and then every 90 minutes his memory resets. I stand by what I said in my succinct Goodreads review: “Crushingly, achingly beautiful. Like something holy.”

sladehouse

  • Slade House—David Mitchell
    • My first foray into the weird world of David Mitchell (author of, among many others, Cloud Atlas), this book was fascinating. It’s a bit similar to Danielewski’s House of Leaves, but if HoL featured a worldwide conspiracy of mystics. Really fun ideas mixed with, honestly, true horror.

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  • The End of the Moment We Had—Toshiki Okada
    • This, along with the aforementioned Advent of the Algorithm by David Berlinski, was one of my least favorite reads of 2019. Maybe it’s something lost in translation, but it just feels like yet another tired book from a male writer wanting to discuss his apathy toward sex, relationships, and an inability to connect. Gross shit.

grieffeathers

  • Grief is the Thing With Feathers—Max Porter (possible novel of the year)
    • This may be the only book that has ever actually made me cry. A “novel,” if you can call it that, Max Porter’s debut stretches beyond any real genre. It is a poetic/prose/play all in his own style, and it is about the grief of a father and two boys after the mother/wife dies. The less said about this, the better, in my opinion. That way you can have a pure, expectation-less experience. As a father of two boys (and a girl), the plot obviously got its hooks into me emotionally.

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  • The Weight of Words—Dave McKean and William Schafer
    • If you like the art of Dave McKean (notably, the artist behind Neal Gaiman’s Sandman graphic novels), you should pick up this work. Each story is based on a particular image created by McKean, with varying success (in my opinion). Some really good gems here, but also some that fall flat. You know, it’s my typical gripe about story collections. They rarely all are up to snuff (I’m looking at you, Gaiman, who let me down in this book).

riddance

  • Riddance: Or: The Sybil Joines Vocational School for Ghost Speakers & Hearing-Mouth Children—Shelley Jackson (possible novel of the year)
    • I’ve been telling everyone I know who loves weird fiction about this novel. I NEED to read more of Shelley Jackson’s work. This book centers around a school for stutterers that is… unorthodox. The founder, the eponymous Sybil Joines, discovered that stutterers actually can communicate with and enter into the land of the dead through their mouths. Exceedingly weird, Riddance is a pastiche of several narrative lines that are all very compelling: letters to dead authors from Joines, a transcript of Joines’ last trip to the land of the dead, the stenographer’s notes about her experience living at the school, and more. I loved this book.

ravicka

  • Houses of Ravicka—Renee Gladman
    • I struggled with recommending this one because it may be too weird even for me (which I know seems odd given my wholehearted championing of Riddance just now). However, Gladman seems a bit too interested in the sort of “art for art’s sake” pretentiousness that I find uncomfortable. The book is set in her imagined city-state of Ravicka, a place where houses and the very geography often moves about. It is reflective of the author’s views on architecture, but in her endnotes Gladman even admits that she purposefully swapped the narrator’s gender back and forth from male to female not because of the character’s gender fluidity but because she inserted too much of herself into the character, or something. I don’t know. It seems all too academic and hifalutin, too self-serious, for my taste. It is, of course, very well written, though.

alicepayneone

  • Alice Payne Arrives (Alice Payne #1)—Kate Heartfield
    • This book features elegantly plotted time travel, primarily a female cast, queer love, and dialogue that passes the Bechdel test. Heartfield is a new name to me, but I absolutely must read the rest of this series. She has a wonderful voice that delves into both character development and intricate plot work, as well as an adept hand at weaving believable sci-fi worlds. If I may be so crass: it’s extremely my shit.

multiplechoice

  • Multiple Choice—Alejandro Zambra
    • While not detestable like The End of the Moment We Had, this book was among my least favorite this year. The writing is good, and I enjoyed the experimental nature of framing/presenting a novel in the shape of a multiple-choice exam, but ultimately I don’t think the literary game “landed” for this one. I am interested to read more of Zambra’s work, though, as he is considered one of Chile’s preeminent writers.

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  • Still Life (Chief Inspector Gamache #1)—Louise Penny
    • My wife recommended the Chief Inspector Gamache books to me, and I am glad she did. If you love warm, charming characters and intriguing mysteries, check out this series by Penny. I loved this book, and my wife considers it her least favorite in the series, so I’m looking forward to reading more!

sharpobjects

  • Sharp Objects—Gillian Flynn
    • Wow. From the author of Gone Girl, this debut novel is about a series of murders in a small town covered by a reporter who is from that town but moved away years ago. She returns to a highly dysfunctional family and a town reeling from the deaths of two young girls. Written in a unique voice and a style as precise as the razor on its cover, Sharp Objects is nearly a perfect story in its genre.

curiousincident

  • The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time—Mark Haddon
    • This award-winning novel is told from the perspective of a teenage boy who is neuroatypical. As he investigates the death of a neighbor’s dog, he narrates for us this story, told (if I remember correctly) through his journal entries. The book is absolutely breathtaking and will leave you in a heap of emotions that Christopher, the story’s narrator, often does not appear to experience as we do.

lanny

  • Lanny—Max Porter
    • The second of Porter’s books that I read this year, Lanny does not reach quite the same heights as Grief is the Thing With Feathers. However, it is still a work of art, emotionally moving, and technically masterful. The story centers around a young boy, the eponymous Lanny, and his experience being a bit more attuned to the nature-spirit-type-entity called Dead Papa Toothwort. A very strange book, it’s well worth the time.

pursuit

  • Pursuit—Joyce Carol Oates
    • I debated recommending this one. I gave it five stars on Goodreads, and it was quite good. It made me want to read more of Oates’ work, but it wasn’t the best crime-based novel that I read this year. Pursuit is about a woman who, the day after her wedding, steps into traffic. Her husband visits her in the hospital and tries to decipher why she would do such a thing, and what exactly in her past drove her to attempt suicide right after they were about to start their lives together.

comics/graphic novels

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  • Bloodborne—Aleš Kot and Piotr Kowalski
    • What can I say? It’s an adaptation of one of my favorite video games of all time.

rustybrown

  • Rusty Brown—F. C. Ware
    • Hoo boy. From the author of Jimmy Corrigan: The Smartest Kid on Earth comes another soul-crushing, heart-breaking tale of a young kid coming of age and human beings growing and connecting. Check it at your own risk.

handmaidtale

  • The Handmaid’s Tale: The Graphic Novel—Margaret Atwood and Renée Nault
    • This is the graphic novel adaptation of Atwood’s famous novel. It is very good and very beautiful.

akira

  • Akira, Vol. 1 through 6—Katsuhiro Otomo
    • One artist’s grappling with the dangers of nuclear power and the exponential growth of technology, Akira changed the landscape of graphic novels and comics. I remember watching the film, which basically adapts only Volumes 1 through 3, I think, and which was directed by the Otomo. It is required reading for any enthusiast of comics and graphic novel culture.

shortcomings

  • Shortcomings—Adrian Tomine
    • This one was given to me by a good friend. I liked it, but I didn’t love it. It basically revolves around an Asian-American man struggling with his own constant negativity, living in modern American society, and facing significant difficulties in his love life.

thenight

  • The Night—Philippe Druillet
    • Apparently written after Druillet’s wife died of cancer, The Night is a surreal comic about a future humanity living in a post-apocalyptic wasteland. It’s an intense story with stellar art that showcases our species’ struggle with the consciousness of its own impending death.

futurenow

  • The Future is Now—Josan Gonzalez
    • I have been asking for this book every Christmas for the past few years and finally got my hands on it this year, thanks to my parents. There were only a few thousand created, and Volume 1 is out of print. With virtually no text, the graphic novel is a window into Gonzalez’s idea about the future of society and how it relates to technology: cyborgs, robots, full-robot cities, a Texan nation-state that features a Thunderdome-esque battle royale show, and more.

orcstain

  • Orc Stain, Vol. 1—James Stokoe
    • Mainly following the exploits of a unique orc with one eye, Orc Stain features the incredible artwork of Stokoe and its world feels truly alive. The Orctzar and his improbable, massive army of northern orcs is on the move, looking for One-Eye because of an oracle that foretells One-Eye will be his empire’s downfall. It’s a bizarre, wild place where orcs trade in “chits,” which are coins that are actually dried and preserved slices of… each others’ “gronches.” Yeah, you guess right. It’s their dicks. Their money is slices of each other’s penises. Yeah. Yep.

 

suicide letter, pt. 1 [working title]

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Photo by Cherry Laithang on Unsplash

I. Hole-Puncher

if I were to write a suicide note,
I would want to talk about gravity
—about how when we fall the Earth inches
imperceptibly toward us, coming up
to meet us mid-air. Our own planet is
an aggressor against us! (I once saw
a young girl pierced by the root of a tree…)
Is it possible to live in a world
that by its nature punches holes in you?

II. Abaddon

there is a caterpillar named Doubt
who, with his razor teeth,
gnaws and shreds his slow way
across the foliage
of Truth and Salvation,
eating through their membranes,
dissolving their cell walls
like a cancer. This worm
(or is it Wyrm?) is not
an unnatural thread
in our world’s great pattern.
For it is the nature
of all leafy green things—
of all things beautiful,
good, and worthy of praise—
to fall prey to Eaters,
to drought and entropy.
This is the way of it.
It’s inevitable.
And the last leafy thing
that Doubt will perforate
is his own opposite—
a tree-root that spouts up
from the ground of All-Things,
an emanating lightbeam called Hope.

PSYCHO PATH—A Brief Review

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The latest short film from indie horror outfit 4 Leagues Media, PSYCHO PATH is a fantastic addition to their repertoire. I first heard of 4 Leagues Media through my friend and local writing group member Kayla Stuhr, who is part of the company and has produced, directed, acted, and written in these films. Like many of their short films, PSYCHO PATH is designed for the circuit, where the crew recently won numerous awards for their horror short Tethered. I was lucky enough to get a special code to watch PSYCHO PATH online, so I’m going to give you my honest opinion here. Nevermind that I know Ms. Stuhr. She told me not to be too nice.

But enough of that. Let’s get into the details of this film. I’ll try not to post anything too spoilery. The film is only 12 minutes, so I don’t want to give away too much.

A General Gist of the Plot

Some have said that the found footage genre is dead. For a while, I thought so too. It seemed like Cloverfield was the culmination of found footage and nothing could really build upon it. Then I saw the horror flick Creep. If you’ve read my brief film reviews, you know that I loved Mark Duplass’ film. The trick was Creep’s ability to justify the found footage mechanism. It was upfront about the fact that the characters were specifically attempting to create a home video, so all of the cinematography made sense within the context of the story.

PSYCHO PATH is much like Creep in that regard. Much of the 12 minutes of the film is captured by the personal camera of our main character, Laurel Rhodes. A vlogger who has a social media channel called Off Roads, Laurel takes her camera with her on backpacking adventures to find interesting trails, waterfalls, scenic locations, and probably anything else that captures her eye in the deep woods. This time around, she’s seeking a specific forest tunnel of some kind, but gets sidetracked by a storm and stumbles upon a lone, empty cabin.

Inside, inevitably, Laurel finds strange runic markings. More importantly for her situation, she finds a dry loft where she can rest her head as the storm passes.

Then, all hell breaks loose. I won’t say anymore here. You can’t make me.

My Thoughts on the Film as a Work of Art

As with most short films, the plot is simple enough. It’s the execution of the story that sets a horror short apart from the milieu. In haphazard fashion, as is my wont, I will now tell you how I think PSYCHO PATH measures up.

Abigail Wilson nails her role as Laurel. It can be difficult to carry the momentum of a story when you’re the only face on screen for the majority of the time, but she manages to seem real, nuanced, human, and exactly like I would expect a backpacking vlogger to be.

Unfortunately, the rest of the cast is not as good as she is. In fact, I’d say this film’s one downside is the awkwardness and somewhat stilted nature of the scenes with characters other than Laurel. This is not enough of a criticism to take away from the overall effect of the film, but it should be noted.

Aside from Wilson’s stellar performance, PSYCHO PATH is carried by its aesthetic and ability to capitalize on excellent moments of terror. Let’s talk aesthetic first. The lighting is great, the interior of the cabin is magnificently styled, and the clips of previous episodes of Off Roads are a really nice touch that sets the mood and establishes Laurel’s character brilliantly. Of course, no horror film is complete without music that colors the scenes. Composer Matt Vucic delivers a haunting score that genuinely impressed me.

Okay, now for the moments of terror. Let me explain what I’m talking about. HEY, HERE’S A SPOILER: when a man enters the cabin in the middle of the night, Laurel starts to climb down from the loft to announce her presence. Then, while she is poised halfway up a ladder in the background, the man begins to drag a body into the quiet room. We sit there, paused and tense with Laurel, as we pray for the man not to see her or hear her creaks as she slowly tries to hide herself again. OKAY, SPOILER OVER.

That kind of moment is pure. It shows what Tethered began to tell the world: 4 Leagues Media understands horror. They understand what makes us afraid, and how to exploit those moments in creative and sense-heightening ways.

The filmmakers are also well-versed in that old adage: show, don’t tell. They let us, the viewers, make of this film what we will. They let us tell ourselves the tale. They are careful to give us only the details we need to conjure the demons in our own imagination. If anything, the film left me wanting just a few more answers, just a little more information. It’s a delicate balance between revealing so little that your audience doesn’t understand the film and revealing so much that your audience is bored with what is inevitably not as scary as they made it out to be in their minds. Fortunately for us all, 4 Leagues Media seems at home on that tightrope.

Plus, the runic symbols are freaking cool. It’s difficult to create a thing that is objectively cool these days, with so much of our art shrouded in irony and cross-references.

The Final Analysis

PSYCHO PATH is really good. It’s not a perfect film, but it is great at showcasing the skill on offer at 4 Leagues Media. I’ve now seen two of their shorts, and I can say that their range is broad as well. Don’t let the simplicity of the story fool you: there is nuance here. This isn’t just a cookie-cutter film crew. I expect to hear a lot of great things about them in the future, and honestly I can’t wait until I’m able to watch another of their movies.

Overall, I give PSYCHO PATH 8/10. But remember kids: numerical scores are usually dumb. What I really mean to say is: see the film if you are lucky enough to have the chance.